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Everybody Wants to Die 2: The M E G A Thread

I step outside towards the man from Japan who was conversing with the goblin leader.

"... yes. Why do you want to know that, anyways?"

My voice has a slight but distinct rasp to it, like how many cartoons depict snakes talking.
 
"Something like curiosity, I suppose. That and I seek aid in trying to somewhat repair the mess that this world has become. It's not like a normal human could help much there."
 
"Oh yeah, this world is crazy, we fought this really weird vampire that sucked the blood out of a gigantic elemental titan. Before all of that we met a colonel who had taken over the US."
 
It's then, watching on her tablet, that Ichika notices Iyl's energy signature. To be fair, she was really busy watching gunner's bullshit unfold.

"...Illya had a kid?"
 
Ichika feels a tap on her shoulder.

"Not a kid in the conventional sense. I was curious as to how this all would go, so I made him and sent him in." Ilia would reply, in the cosmic restaurant the two happened to be in.


Iyl would seem curious.

"Could you tell me more about what you faced so far?"
 
Coolguy looks confused.

"... Where did you get in here from?"
 
"Well, there's been the goblins which you're well acquainted with."

There's a distinct snarl audible as I say this.

"Then, there's the massive elemental beings wandering this continent and "The Colonel." Another one I never got the name of was dealt with by my compatriots here."
 
"First Dante, now this..." Ichika sighs. "I was hoping this could be a bit more controlled... but as long as Nil doesn't **** up, things should be fine."
 
"Nil is probably the one going along with things the most out of any of them, but that's to be expected because he has everything to gain from that." Dante retorts from his seat.
 
"...wait. Did you just say Nil?"

Ilia would pause for a moment, then glance at Dante.

"And you're here too, huh."


"I see. What do you all plan to do then? I'd like allies in cleaning up the world, and disposing of things like the titans."

Iyl would ask, recalling what he saw in the circle.
 
"Wait hold on, wasn't Nil the guy running the experiment you guys were all in?"
 
"I'm in many places, just like you all."

Dante turns to Coolguy

"Yeah. Puncher did his namesake so hard I think Nil's parents had to scrape his manhood off the wall with one of those paint removers."



"I intended to deal with the elementals right here, but Nil,"

I point to Nil for emphasis.

"Wants to negotiate. I also intend to deal with the goblins later."
 
"... I mean, I know that much, I was the one that punched puncher into that punch. Why is he here, though?"
 
"I could've sworn he was just gone. Huh."

Ilia looks genuinely surprised.


Iyl stares at Nil for a good while.

"Something feels very wrong here."

"In any case, I'd thought of dealing with them as well. Is negotiating really a possibility at all?"
 
"At first I thought it would be funny to revive him as a femboy... Then he actually started rolling with it."
 
"... w h a t."

Coolguy actually looks at the tablet Ichika is holding... takes off his sunglasses, and looks back at Ichika, baffled.
 
"And you people say I'm the sadistic one~."

Dante takes a sip of something pitch-black, like tar.




"Well, to put it bluntly, I don't believe a single word that came out of that creature's mouth. I've seen hundreds of similar beings preach the same ideas only to betray everyone who followed them after it was far too late to turn back."
 
"That was an odd choice, I see."

Ilia responded, also taking a sip of something that seemed to be colored like a space itself.


Iyl was still staring at Nil, baffled.

"What did the creature claim?"
 
"..." Ichika goes red-faced "L-look, If you saw him you'd think the same!" She holds the tablet up indignantly.
 
"..."

Coolguy just backs off, raising his arms as if clearly desiring to judge but refusing to do so.

... Then that immensely unholy presence returns.

"... Well, at least that lasted longer than I expected. See you guys later."

Coolguy sighs, puts on his sunglasses, and dashes out the door, shortly followed with the nightmarish scream of "SEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNPPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII" once again.
 
Fleet just... looks a bit shocked at that scream, however he is too concerned eating some ice cream to continue caring about it.
 
Seven's bar hears a distinct knock at the door.



Nameless has been trying to find ways to make Earth even more miserable while all happens. He decided batting meteors and asteroids in Earth's direction would make a good past time.
 
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