Douchebag genie: Screw over peoples wishes

[azontr]

Douchebag Genie, I wish to Bargain.

Bargain accepted. But you now have no lower body in exchange for me accepting your bargain.

 

[Imaginym]

(I want this thread to continue so....)

I wish for everyone in this thread to have a good whatever-time-it-is-where-they-are, & for this wish to not cause them bad fortune when what time it is for them changes.

(Also, sadly, I couldn't find any ungranted wishes to grant.)

 

[azontr]

I wish for everyone in this thread to have a good whatever-time-it-is-where-they-are, & for this wish to not cause them bad fortune when what time it is for them changes.

Granted. But you yourself are turned into a potato.

 

[OriginFox]

I wishi could solve every scientific mysteries

 

[Oliver_de_jesus]

I wishi could solve every scientific mysteries

Granted, you and the world are now traumatized by discovering secrets that should never be discovered by mankind.

 

[Emirp sumitpo]

I wish that I could drink air

 

[azontr]

I wish that I could drink air

Granted. But the air is poisonous.

 

[Arceus0x]

I wish that I could drink air

Granted, but you can only drink air now and all air is now liquid for you, causing you inability to properly speak and giving extreme pain to your lungs

 

[Oliver_de_jesus]

i wish i had supernatural willpower

 

[azontr]

i wish i had supernatural willpower

Granted. But you have so much willpower that you cannot mentally handle it, which causes your head to go boom boom.

 

[Nullflowerblush]

I wish there were suddenly a ton more high-quality (I won't allow you to ruin the wish by making them low-quality) Helluva Boss episodes.

 

[azontr]

I wish there were suddenly a ton more high-quality (I won't allow you to ruin the wish by making them low-quality) Helluva Boss episodes.

Granted. But you are now deaf and blind so you cannot watch or listen to them.

 

[OriginFox]

I wish I was the best artist in the world

 

[Daddybrawl]

I wish I was the best artist in the world

Granted.
Art is subjective, though, so everyone else hates it.

I wish I could jump in and out of fictional worlds.

 

[Emirp sumitpo]

I wish I could jump in and out of fictional worlds.

Granted, but you can only do so with cringy fanfics.

 

[azontr]

I wish I was omniscient.

 

[Lou_change]

I wish I was omniscient.

You learn the genie is going to shoot you.

I wish for the complete destruction of everything.

 

[azontr]

I wish for the complete destruction of everything.

Granted. But you are now everything, so you are destroyed.

 

[Daddybrawl]

You learn learn the genie is going to shoot you.

I wish for the complete destruction of everything.

Granted. It’s all destroyed, and then recreated.

I wish Cringy Fanfics were good.

 

[azontr]

I wish Cringy Fanfics were good.

Granted. Everything else besides those fanfics now suck ass.

 

[Livinmeme]

I wish that bleach made a crossover with fast and furious and they figth sonic oh also everybody resist their hax and is just a pure AP battle

 

[azontr]

I wish that bleach made a crossover with fast and furious and they figth sonic oh also everybody resist their hax and is just a pure AP battle

Granted. But I fuq ur mum.

 

[Oliver_de_jesus]

I wish not to feel pain

 

[azontr]

I wish not to feel pain

Granted. But you can no longer wipe your ass, causing the poopy to make nobody want to be around you.

 

[Daddybrawl]

I wish that bleach made a crossover with fast and furious and they figth sonic oh also everybody resist their hax and is just a pure AP battle

Granted, but it’s a Fan-Made Crossover. It’s not Canon and is overall pretty bad.

I wish chalk wasn’t bad to eat.

 

[Livinmeme]

Granted. But I fuq ur mum.

You know considering things.. that isnt changing much anyway

 

[Emirp sumitpo]

I wish not to feel pain

Granted, but all your love ones will be in agony for all of eternity

 

[azontr]

I wish chalk wasn’t bad to eat.

Granted. But you have to eat an entire live cow.

 

[Livinmeme]

Granted, but it’s a Fan-Made Crossover. It’s not Canon and is overall pretty bad.

I wish chalk wasn’t bad to eat.

That only makes it better fool

 

[Livinmeme]

I wish not to feel pain

Granted but you cant feel any sense of fear in any way making you to be in extremlly dangerous situations without trying to survive, like you could be on fire and not notice for like 5 minutes. oh also you are you cant just feel pain you arent immune to damage

 

[Oliver_de_jesus]

Granted, but all your love ones will be in agony for all of eternity

What if my loved ones are no longer my loved ones?

 

[Epiccheev]

I wish to live in a giant pineapple

 

[azontr]

What if my loved ones are no longer my loved ones?

Then the planet explodes.

 

[Emirp sumitpo]

I wish to live in a giant pineapple

Granted, but you will never experience happiness again

 

[Livinmeme]

I wish to live in a giant pineapple

You leave under the sea and die because of the preasure and not being to breath water

 

[azontr]

I wish to live in a giant pineapple

Granted. But the pineapple is alive and whenever you try to do something inside of it, it compresses until it crushes you, forcing you to purchase a different house to avoid death.

 

[OriginFox]

I wish I could turn into inanimate objects while retaining my consciousness

 

[Imaginym]

I wish I could turn into inanimate objects while retaining my consciousness

Granted. But you cannot revert from your transformations until the objects are destroyed, & are incapable of any action the inanimate object could not do normally, often leaving you paralyzed within your own mind until your new body is destroyed, or decayed over the course of many, many years....

(Reposting an ungranted wish of mine from earlier in this thread.)

I wish that everyone prior in this thread who wished for superpowers would get them stolen by Sheldon Dinkleberg &/or Gary Oak, who would viciously mock their victims at every opportunity.

 

[azontr]

I wish that everyone prior in this thread who wished for superpowers would get them stolen by Sheldon Dinkleberg &/or Gary Oak, who would viciously mock their victims at every opportunity.

Granted. But your a potato now.

 

[OriginFox]

Granted. But you cannot revert from your transformations until the objects are destroyed, & are incapable of any action the inanimate object could not do normally, often leaving you paralyzed within your own mind until your new body is destroyed, or decayed over the course of many, many years....

(Reposting an ungranted wish of mine from earlier in this thread.)

I wish that everyone prior in this thread who wished for superpowers would get them stolen by Sheldon Dinkleberg &/or Gary Oak, who would viciously mock their victims at every opportunity.

Granted, but now you hear everything Sheldon or Gary says and thinks constantly