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Warhammer 40,000: Discussione Generalis #2

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Thinking about tech weapons here and such, i wonder how much Star Wars would have to compare to these things in order to even be relevant in Warhammer.

But anyways, Warhammer tech is just so funny and awesome. Theres even hand cannons that can shoot projectiles with a potency equal to a solar flare for crying outloud! xD
 
@Azzy

How the **** is anyone supposed to navigate on this galaxy? This is Age of Strife level insanity.
 
@Matt

Apparently, you don't. The Imperium has essentially been split in half, and a big part of 8th Edition's story will revolve around Mankind's new leadership trying to deal with that.

Also, the first major event of 8th ed./the one that comes in the starter box seems like it's going to be Death Guard vs some Marine chapter that we're not sure of, yet. Coupled with the spoiler, Mortarion will likely be joining the story very shortly after 8th ed. drops.
 
So because I've been putting this off for way too long and want to make Guilliman's profile soon, in honor of 8th edition coming up, here's the summary for the first chapter of Rise of the Primarch.

  • Book begins on one of the planets in Ultramar, where a bunch of Black Legion Chaos Space Marines have have killed off a bunch of local defense forces. This means the no-name fuckbois Abaddon sent to cause havoc are already doing a better job than the soldiers he took with himself to Cadia.
  • Suddenly, a portal tears open and the traitor Marines begin to get shredded in a hail of fire as the Ynnari and Celestinians burst through, probably while this plays in the background.
  • After omfgwtfbbqstomping the remaining CSM, Yvraine reveals they aren't on Macragge, but instead Laphis, a planet 160 million miles away from Macragge, mainly because they didn't want to pop up in a bad position while the Ultramarines are all coked up and get shot to death.
  • The gang eventually makes their way to an Ultramarine bunker. The Astartes inside thankfully seem quite willing to listen despite the fact they were travelling with xenos, mainly because they saved them from a squadron of Heldrakes and they were also led by a ******* Living Saint.
  • The Ultramarines decide to be bros and provide the group with a ride to Macragge. As a gesture of goodwill, the Sisters of Battle and Imperial Knights stay behind to help the Ultramarines defend Laphis, while all the Aeldari except for Yvraine and the Visarch return to the Webway to show they have no ulterior motives. That leaves Celestine, Cawl, Greyfax, Marshal Amalrich, Yvraine, and the Visarch headed for Macragge, now accompanied only by the Geminae Superia, several Black Templars, and the remainder of Cawl's Kataphron servitors and Skitarii warriors.
  • While the group kills time as they make their way towards the crown world of Ultramar, Yvraine and Cawl have a super secret meeting about super secret things. Spoilers: It's about the dude who's on the cover of the book.
  • Upon arriving, our heroes need to make their way through heavy space combat and fleets of Black Legion, Iron Warriors, Night Lords, the Purge, etc. spacecraft who are all attacking the Ultramarines' capital fortress, because **** Ultramarines.
  • After arriving, some Ultramarine Sergeant takes them up to the command center, where they meet with Marneus Calgar/Mac Daddy/Papa Smurf, First Captain Agemman, Chief Librarian Tigurius, and our new friend Grey Knight Grand Master Voldus, who you know is important because he came in the box set.
  • As a side note, we get to find out how Voldus became Grand Master of the 3rd Brotherhood, which was apparently by shooting Kaldor Draigo out of his mind at a Lord of Change, and then he was promoted. I am not even kidding.
  • After being told he had apparently made a pact with Cawl, Calgar basically replies with "Who?". Cue collective gasp. Cawl then specifies than he isn't there to make good on a promise he made to Calgar, but the true Lord of Ultramar, Roboute Guilliman himself. Cue more dramatic collective gasp.
  • The Ultramarines quickly turn on the newcomers, some Honour Guard even daring to point their filthy smurf guns at angel waifu. Agemman suggests the human travellers be jailed and the xenos killed, but Tigurius vouches for them because he had a weird dream and is also a pretty cool guy.
  • At Calgar's request, everyone tells the story of how they ended up where they currently are, except for Cawl, who basically just responds with "No **** you." every time Calgar questions him.
  • Papa Smurf eventually gives the group permission to visit the Shrine of Guilliman under heavy guard. Even the two Aeldari, because Calgar believes the Emperor brought them here and also isn't a total racist.
  • Once inside the shrine, Calgar once more requests Cawl to tell him why he's here, and we finally get to hear some of his backstory. The Archmagos explains that years before the Heresy, Guilliman had summoned him for an audience, seeing great things in Cawl and entrusting him with a sacred duty. The first part of this manifested in a suit of armour greater than any ever produced by the Imperium, which would even heal the fatal wounds inflicted on Guilliman by Daemon Prince Fulgrim.
  • Yvraine follows this by explaining that Guilliman's resurrection will also be guided by Ynnead, but in order for the Primarch to be revived, he must first fully die (remind you of anyone?). The Ultramarines promptly flip their shit. Tigurius once more proves he is an OG and stands with Cawl, Celestine, and Yvraine.
  • Suddenly, a bunch of Chaos Space Marines decide to slam a stolen Thunderhawk into Guilliman's shrine. A bunch of Raptors hop out of the gunship, slam some icons into the ground, and summon metric fuckton of Black Legion Terminators for backup. As should be expected, massive amounts of fighting ensues.
  • Cawl decides that waiting is for people who don't have robot spider legs and begins setting up the auto-reliquary. Calgar watches in horror as the strange device begins to enfold the Primarch's form and Yvraine raises her blade. He yells frantically for Tigurius to stop them, but the Librarian looks him in the eyes, solemnly uttering the words..."Nah, fam."
  • Completely surrounded by hundreds of Chaos warriors and monstrosities, the loyalist forces are extremely close to being steamrolled into oblivion. However, just as things look bleakest, the auto-reliquary opens up, revealing a very confused but very much alive Guilliman. Obviously, he does what anyone would do after waking up after 10,000 years, which is to start capping anyone who isn't wearing your home team's colors. Guilliman then proceeds to almost single-handedly curbstomp all the Chaos forces.
  • Guilliman further demonstrates his OPness by having such ridiculously good tactics that he repels the entire invading Chaos force off the planet in THREE HOURS.
  • Finally, after being reappointed as Lord of Ultramar, Guilliman asks everyone just what the **** has been going on since he was put in stasis. Massive amounts of face-palming will inevitably ensue.
There. Chapter 1's summary is finally done. Chapter 2 will be out soon. I promise.
 
Rowboat Girlyman.

Good golly, I really need to read more 40k. Just a few books in and I am already in love with it~
 
@Volundox

>GW trying to make things less OP in new edition

>literally every shit-tier psyker and their mother can ignore all saves

Top ******* kek. Good job "balancing the psychic phase", guys.

@EliminatorVenom

Robot Gorillaman.

It's a great setting.
 
@Matt

Canon SW gets absolutely brutalized.

Legends/EU stands more of a chance, but they certainly don't win. Maybe against the on-average much weaker 40k fluff from like 20 years ago, but definitely not against the current shit.
 
Given what Canon SW have so far, I doubted that their tech can compete with Warhammer's.

So I suspected the EU version would last a bit more longer.
 
I mean, it depends on the interpretation.

EU Tech and 40K tech is more or less comparable, though 40K has some stronger things, but Star Wars has larger numbers.

EU Sidious could easily mindfuck most of the Imperium, but Magnus, Malcador and the Emperor could do the same to the entire Galactic Empire.
 
Matthew Schroeder said:
EU Sidious could easily mindfuck most of the Imperium, but Magnus, Malcador and the Emperor could do the same to the entire Galactic Empire.
You have no idea how many debates I've seen come down to just this.
 
A company named Games Workshop. Warhammer was thought up originally as a board game by them. I don't think there was one original mind behind Warhammer, more like it was thought up by a room full of people.
 
@Azzy

People on an image board were spamming rate my list earlier, but every list was 7 exalted sorcerers lel.
 
Btw, I've been researching and looking into it for quite some time now, but I never get a definite answer.

Where do humans go after they die?

I mean, unprotected eldar become Slaneesh's snacks, and some (?) souls become part of the Warp after they die, becoming one with the living madness that it is. But what happens with humans? (And people of other races that aren't eldar too)
 
@EV

It's rarely ever elaborated upon, and we don't get a direct answer for most humans, but it's suggested that those who are loyal become "one" with the Emperor's conscious in the Warp, or something along those lines, as to be protected from Chaos. They essentially become part of what the Emperor's overall psychic conscious actually is; the collective will and spirit of humanity. Blanks (with absolute zero presence outside the materium, making them like walking psychic black holes) presumably just cease to exist, since they never had a soul to begin with.

Orks have been suggested to essentially reincarnate (can't remember if that's still canon), or simply continue to fight in the afterlife alongside Gork and Mork.

Most Tyranids aren't technically sentient, so when one dies, their bodies are simply recycled into new forms. All Tyranids are basically just small parts of the Hive Mind (who is the Tyranid), and thus they don't really have a traditional life/death cycle. I believe Inquisitor Kryptman (the guy who first witnessed and named the Tyranids) hypothesized that while all Tyranids could potentially be "killed", their psychic hunger could not be, which has interesting implications. The only real exceptions to this cycle are extreme fringe cases such as the Swarmlord, who is an actual separate consciousness inside the Hive Mind, who can be repeatedly reborn into new bodies. How exactly that particular being maintains its own mind is unknown.

No idea how it works for the Tau. Like all sapient beings who aren't blanks, the Tau do have a presence in the Warp, but because their race is so young, said presence is infinitesimally small and they do not have any individuals actually capable of utilizing psychic powers. Because of this, their souls are likely just scattered randomly throughout the Immaterium when they die.

Necrons pretty much relinquished their souls back when they first struck a deal with the C'tan. However, when one of their physical bodies is destroyed, the code composing a Necron's mind remains. While Warriors may have no mind left, this means that individuals who retained a good portion of their personality, such as Lords, can be functionally immortal if surrogate bodies are available for their minds to be sent into upon their demise. Trazyn is the epitome of this, as he has countless surrogates due to all the people who want him dead.
 
It is not unlikely to assume that much like the Chaos Gods have their own realms in the Warp, that so would The Emperor. My headcanon is that he has a golden Mount Olympus-like Heaven in the Warp.
 
It sounds, but I doubt GW would ever expand on the Warp-Emperor and officialize something like that. They seem far too determined on making him as vague as possible.
 
@Azzy

Interesting. As for me, I always imagined some kind of Valhalla for the humans to eternally fight. Except that they fight daemons instead of each other. And everything is golden.
 
Are any of the Warhammer video games canon? The verse has piqued my interest somewhat, and I think some of these cool-looking games could make for a good entry point for me. I'm especially interested in Total War: Warhammer (a RTS) and WH4K: Dawn of War (an action-oriented title).
 
@Freeman

Sadly, I think the games aren't canon (BUT I could be wrong). Otherwise, Captain Titus would be a legit thing.

By the way, what do you guys think about WH40K: Space Marine? I've played it a long time ago, and I thought it was awesome, albeit a bit too easy to die.
 
Aw, no! I like Captain Titus! Please let him be canon!

Oh, anyway. But are any of the games a good introduction to the verse? I'm thinking of picking them up based on quality, as well.
 
Yeah, Titus is awesome. The only smurf that is universally liked by everyone in WH40K fandom~

I think so. Dawn of War provided quite a bit of lore and a nice, yet simple introduction to factions, and the plot also helped to give a general insight in the 40k conflicts. Space Marine allowed one to see how life was from the POV of a Space Marine and a "typical" mission for a Space Marine that, as expected from the verse, goes wrong in all possible senses of the word.
 
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