Alex breathed deeply and said, “It makes sense that you wouldn’t be able to trust us so easily. I’ve been called overly trusting a few times. However if we want this mission to succeed that means we need to be able to believe in one another. That will take time so we’ll just have to build it up slowly as a team.”
As he listens, PTSD began ensuing once more...
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He knew Elide would still be pissed off at him, he knew that his newfound allies wouldn't trust him.
"Momoku... I know what you feel, it's natural for a human being to feel these emotions. You can tell me what's on your mind, remember that you are not alone. I'm still here, I'm here to protect you when you're sad; when you're in danger, and whenever you're feeling hopeless." says Okane as he made an appendage to pat him on the back.
"Forget the past Momoku, nothing will happen if you keep holding on to the memories. Let it go, you don't have to suffer any longer," says Okane, feeling worried about him.
Momoku didn't answer, his silence told Okane his grief. He knew he can't convince him to. It's too painful for him to let go, he can't possibly let their aspirations go away like dust. He covers his face as tears flood his face with sadness. He couldn't even cry hard enough, his voice couldn't be heard by anyone.
He is left alone to deal with his grief. It isn't a simple process of talking to just pass this burden onto anyone else. As smart as he is and as strong as he was, he is too weak when facing the haunting nightmares of his past. It was cold and chilling, draining him of all hope as he despaired.
Momoku thought to himself, asking why would Soteria let her creation suffer like this. He looks at his hand, wondering if living is even worth it. He was beyond depressed. He simply wanted to die, to end this nightmare. To get out and find his solace. To see his family in the afterlife.
But he couldn't bring himself to.
He knew in the back of his head that he didn't want to die.
He knew that there was something he needs to do before he could kill himself.
And that is to kill Griffith.
But no matter what tools he make, what gadgets he crafted, or what technology he invented, he was unsure if that would put an end to his tyranny. It all felt hopeless. It was like a losing fight.
He knows he won't win, so why bother?
So why bother to try and befriend a rude bastard woman who is practically stupid in every way, a guy named after sour patch kids, a predictable ruthless intangible woman with a doppelganger, A cat who is easily angered by cat jokes which could easily be exploited, a woman made of lightning only to be useless in the face of despair, or even that one silent samurai who needs meditation and can easily be distracted?
He knows all their weaknesses, so why bother befriend them?
They all have powers! They're better than me!
I'm just a useless researcher trying to fit in with the kids!
I'm just a lame-ass jerk!
I'm just an old man trying to get attention!
These thoughts just went over Momoku's head, it was from all the negativity that his family would've said had they been here by now. He could even hear them at this very moment. But it never bothered him or irritated him, he knows it full well.
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