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I created a sandbox for book version of Beldam. I thought it would be better if I shared it and got other people's opinions before creating it. How is it? Is it good, bad or very bad?
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(Needs Thread Moderator Votes) Beldam (Book) Profile Creation
- Thread starter The_Fiend888
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- #2
Bump
King_Dom470
He/Him- 3,420
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For the lifting strength bit just put Average Human instead of "Human level" and for "Peak Human level" just put Peak Human.
Other than that it looks good imo
Other than that it looks good imo
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Thanks. I fixed it.
TWILIGHT-OP
He/Him- 2,906
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IIRC, i heard blog post mustn't contain TIER
in them. So I think you hould it better to ask some admins/staff.
in them. So I think you hould it better to ask some admins/staff.
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On the standard format page for character profiles says someone can write a profile into a blog (or into a sandbox) before publishing it.
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TWILIGHT-OP
He/Him- 2,906
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U should add pic too
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I added the pictures. So, is the profile good now?
TWILIGHT-OP
He/Him- 2,906
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Well u should gets mods opinion rather than mine.
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PBUMP
TWILIGHT-OP
He/Him- 2,906
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Did u contacted mods?
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You should probably put scans in the profile (cropped screenshots of the passages you're referring to) alongside references. For the rest, profile seems good, although you should remove the colons and spaces at the end of text in parenthesis
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Thanks for reply. I fixed it and added some scans.
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Seems alright, yeah. Some format fixes to do but if you want I can do those when it's published.
ShockingPsychic
He/Him- 3,326
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One potential issue, i thought we weren't allowed to use KE calcs unless the character was at least Large Size type 1?
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I think it just needs to have Large Size at all.
King_Dom470
He/Him- 3,420
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It's the KE of her punch tho
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- #23
Actually, I also calculated KE of her whole body, but I just used the average walking speed of a human in that calculation. And the energy produced by KE of her fist was already greater than that of her normal KE.
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Alright, so abilities-wise, all of them need references. It's fine if you don't want to attach links, but the references are a must. Secondly, you should put down actual reasons for the Immortality & Empowerment.
AP is fine since it's been calced. But, If the worlds in question aren't confirmed or hinted at being universes, then far higher should be changed to just higher. Typically far higher is used for when there is a tier jump, Tier 3 to Tier 2, that kinda of stuff.
Also, I personally would make it so all the references are at the end of AP and other statistics in order instead of spread through it. This is just my personal preference though, so you can ignore it.
Lifting Strength is fine, but again as I said before, I would remove the period.
Other than that, the profile seems fine.
- Immortality (Type 2; Blah-Blah)[Refrence]
- Empowerment (Coraline, blah-blah)[Refrence]
AP is fine since it's been calced. But, If the worlds in question aren't confirmed or hinted at being universes, then far higher should be changed to just higher. Typically far higher is used for when there is a tier jump, Tier 3 to Tier 2, that kinda of stuff.
Also, I personally would make it so all the references are at the end of AP and other statistics in order instead of spread through it. This is just my personal preference though, so you can ignore it.
Lifting Strength is fine, but again as I said before, I would remove the period.
Other than that, the profile seems fine.
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Ok.
I added explanations to those two abilities. The reason she had the Empowerment power in her profile was that as she lost souls one by one, her world was slowly losing its reality, becoming, to put it bluntly, like a two-dimensional and rather sloppy painting, and the garden was apparently dissolving into fog. And at the same time she was transformed into her true form, or a form that was closer to her true form. I think tis meant that the Other Mother had lost her power because the souls were taken from her, and that she had grown stronger with the souls she had collected.
And she had type 2 İmmortality because after her hand was severed by a closing door, both it and she continued to live.
I guess yes, as you said, they look better without periods. So I removed the them as much as I could. Oh, and I turned 'far higher' into 'higher'. I don't think Coraline can explore an entire timeline in just one day. She cannot even breathe in space.
I also rewrote some of the abilities descriptions because they weren't very descriptive and the sentences weren't very good. I also added a couple of references.
Thank you for viewing my profile.
I added explanations to those two abilities. The reason she had the Empowerment power in her profile was that as she lost souls one by one, her world was slowly losing its reality, becoming, to put it bluntly, like a two-dimensional and rather sloppy painting, and the garden was apparently dissolving into fog. And at the same time she was transformed into her true form, or a form that was closer to her true form. I think tis meant that the Other Mother had lost her power because the souls were taken from her, and that she had grown stronger with the souls she had collected.
And she had type 2 İmmortality because after her hand was severed by a closing door, both it and she continued to live.
I guess yes, as you said, they look better without periods. So I removed the them as much as I could. Oh, and I turned 'far higher' into 'higher'. I don't think Coraline can explore an entire timeline in just one day. She cannot even breathe in space.
I also rewrote some of the abilities descriptions because they weren't very descriptive and the sentences weren't very good. I also added a couple of references.
Thank you for viewing my profile.
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- #33
ActuallySpace Man42 confirmed that my profile is good enough and two staff are sufficient for this thread. And more than two days have passed since then. So, can someone please close this thread?
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Go on a mods profile and ask the thread to be closed
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