Chair god insults your favorite character(s)

[BoilingMold]

A certain magical cripple has a moment and insults your favorite character(s). What is said and how does the character react?

Assume the Emperor knows all about who he insults and acts like the tts version.

(Stupid shitpost idea? Stupid shitpost idea.)

 

[Stillwinston]

I'll give this a try lol

Caine (World Of Darkness): "And here I thought ******* Horus was a bad kid, you did all the shit you did just because you got pissed at your brother and a thot."

Jonathan Joestar: "Yes you are a gentleman, your also ******* stupid to think that the blonde haired sociopath that cooked your ******* dog would ever do good by you in the end. Have fun missing your body."

Dracula (Castlevania): "**** you know what? Come here you fang faced freak inquiring about what is a man, I will show you that right now son."