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Most Ridiculous, Out of Context Panels and Screenshots - New Forum edition

I gained EE by becoming a dream stan and used it on my father.
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More quotes
"I’ve always liked druids, because they are made of natural ingredients. And I believe that everyone should have such a healthy diet."

"I don’t dream because I don’t sleep. I’m always awake so no one can ever sneak up on me.
If I dreamed, they would be bigger dreams than yours, though, because my head is bigger."

"If I could turn into something else, I wouldn’t. Because everything else is inferior to me."

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but swords will never hurt me — as long as I stay really high and shoot down at an angle."

"Arrows are the worst. They go much farther than eye rays. That’s why I stay indoors all the time. Besides, the sky is totally overrated."

"So there are different names for different sorts of people who swing swords? Why? Let me try: big sword swinger and tiny sword swinger. No, that sounds like it’s the size of the sword that matters. How about: big meat bag with a sword and little meat bag with a sword!"

"I bet I could be a monk if I wanted.

What? Why are you laughing?"

"Why did the samurai cross the road? … Now you say “Why?” … Okay, here’s the joke part: I kensei. Get it? What? Why aren’t you laughing? The joke is solid gold, and my delivery was perfect. Maybe you didn’t get it because you’re stupid."

"So you have this soul, but you can’t see it or touch it. And when you die, this invisible thing leaves your body and goes to a place you can’t see. And you people think I’m crazy?"

"Living up to an oath? That sounds ridiculous. Why would anyone ever do that? There’s nothing wrong with making promises, but only suckers keep them."

"Conquest sounds cool.
Do you have to leave your house for that? Because I’ve got a fish named Sylgar, and I can’t be away for too long or he gets sad."

"Redemption. So you feel bad about having done something, and then you have to do something to feel better? Why don’t you just kill and eat someone? That always makes me feel better."

"I’m a monster. Are you going to try to kill me? Didn’t think so. Go kill some goblins or something. On second thought, goblins aren’t monsters — they’re people. So maybe you should call yourself a people killer."
 
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