Moronic, Mysterious Genius (Wheatley Vs Polly Sparks)

[DimeUhDozen]

The Genius Moron vs The Moronic Genius

Speed Equalized
Battle is a full-on war. Polly is attacking from Mystery Mountain. Wheatley is attacking from Aperture Science.
Polly has all of her optional equipment.
Wheatley is in GLaDOS's body
Battle Music

I AM... NOT... A... MORON!:
Get ready for a fun-packed thrill ride to the BOTTOMLESS PIT!:
Incon:​

 

[DaReaperMan]

Okay so... Polly stomps, wanna know why?

It took hours to a day for Wheatley to **** up Aperature science enough for it to self-destruct. He runs it so catastrophically bad that it can't even properly function with him at the helm.

 

[DimeUhDozen]

Okay so... Polly stomps, wanna know why?

It took hours to a day for Wheatley to ***** up Aperature science enough for it to self-destruct. He runs it so catastrophically bad that it can't even properly function with him at the helm.

Would GLaDOS be a better matchup for her then? Seems just as thematic.

 

[DaReaperMan]

Would GLaDOS be a better matchup for her then? Seems just as thematic.

She isn't a moron though, and she has no qualms with dismantling robots, so chances are she eventually just overwhelms Polly with Aperature's borderline unlimited resources.

But I can see Polly pulling a W here and there so it wouldn't be stompy at least

 

[DimeUhDozen]

She isn't a moron though

I meant thematic in that they're both extremely petty, taunting antagonists who like to torture and test their protagonists from a part of a facility where they can't reach them.

, and she has no qualms with dismantling robots

Polly's robots albeit don't have very good combat experience, or much of any at all, but some like Robbie and the Bombshell have some explosives at their disposal. And while there is a difference in AP, they should be able to do some damage.

, so chances are she eventually just overwhelms Polly with Aperature's borderline unlimited resources.

I think this is where Polly's other resources come in. She has her father's space probes, of which there are multiple. We don't have an exact quantifiable AP for their lasers, just that they are higher, can blow up asteroids of unspecified size, can take hits from comets, and are Massively FTL+, which I think should be able to put up a good fight, especially if it's Polly who's piloting them and flying them around.

Also Polly is the kind of petty bitch who would be like, "Oh?? You're using turrets to blow up my precious machines? I'm going to go back in time to make sure turrets don't exist!" Basically, if you inconvenience her too much, she's going to try and change history to make it different. Her time-travel rules don't fall under alternate timeline rules either. Whatever happens in the past will become her present, with her memories and such being majorly unaffected. Although Polly doesn't immediately lead with this. She just leads with robots first, and will only use time travel if she's aggravated to her petty breaking point.

GLaDOS has the better resources, and is more than willing to murder. While Polly is also willing to murder (she threatened to put Botley in the epicenter of the Big Bang, Jesus Christ), she doesn't have as much experience doing it and her emotions can be manipulated by someone as manipulative as GLaDOS, and she can be lead into doing something extremely stupid. She got criticized once for not practicing typing and locked her typing teacher in the closet for like a day. This ended up being something she would regret and couldn't undo later on, despite her needing the teacher's assistance. Pride cometh before the fall, in Polly's case. She can make smart decisions, but her emotions get in the way. Because she has to prove that she's better and smarter than you, even if that means making it a fair fight.

Also it's interesting because both have a home field advantage if one decides to go to the other. Polly can deactivate machines within the radius of her mansion and activate them, or program them with her remote control. If they decide to go up to the mountain path, she can use SR to warp the terrain to whatever she wants with a thought. But if she decides to send her robots inside Aperture, they would easily become overwhelmed. Basically, Polly's wincon is time travel, but if GLaDOS manipulates her into doing something stupid, she could take the win and overwhelm her. Keep in mind, IC, Polly would try and hack one of the screens in Aperture to specifically taunt and banter with GLaDOS. And as petty and evil as Polly is, she can't hold a candle to the queen of bitchtalking, so throwing stones in glass houses sort of deal. It all depends on whether she can act fast enough to activate her wincon in some way.

 

[DaReaperMan]

I meant thematic in that they're both extremely petty, taunting antagonists who like to torture and test their protagonists from a part of a facility where they can't reach them.

Polly's robots albeit don't have very good combat experience, or much of any at all, but some like Robbie and the Bombshell have some explosives at their disposal. And while there is a difference in AP, they should be able to do some damage.

I think this is where Polly's other resources come in. She has her father's space probes, of which there are multiple. We don't have an exact quantifiable AP for their lasers, just that they are higher, can blow up asteroids of unspecified size, can take hits from comets, and are Massively FTL+, which I think should be able to put up a good fight, especially if it's Polly who's piloting them and flying them around.

Also Polly is the kind of petty bitch who would be like, "Oh?? You're using turrets to blow up my precious machines? I'm going to go back in time to make sure turrets don't exist!" Basically, if you inconvenience her too much, she's going to try and change history to make it different. Her time-travel rules don't fall under alternate timeline rules either. Whatever happens in the past will become her present, with her memories and such being majorly unaffected. Although Polly doesn't immediately lead with this. She just leads with robots first, and will only use time travel if she's aggravated to her petty breaking point.

GLaDOS has the better resources, and is more than willing to murder. While Polly is also willing to murder (she threatened to put Botley in the epicenter of the Big Bang, Jesus Christ), she doesn't have as much experience doing it and her emotions can be manipulated by someone as manipulative as GLaDOS, and she can be lead into doing something extremely stupid. She got criticized once for not practicing typing and locked her typing teacher in the closet for like a day. This ended up being something she would regret and couldn't undo later on, despite her needing the teacher's assistance. Pride cometh before the fall, in Polly's case. She can make smart decisions, but her emotions get in the way. Because she has to prove that she's better and smarter than you, even if that means making it a fair fight.

Also it's interesting because both have a home field advantage if one decides to go to the other. Polly can deactivate machines within the radius of her mansion and activate them, or program them with her remote control. If they decide to go up to the mountain path, she can use SR to warp the terrain to whatever she wants with a thought. But if she decides to send her robots inside Aperture, they would easily become overwhelmed. Basically, Polly's wincon is time travel, but if GLaDOS manipulates her into doing something stupid, she could take the win and overwhelm her. Keep in mind, IC, Polly would try and hack one of the screens in Aperture to specifically taunt and banter with GLaDOS. And as petty and evil as Polly is, she can't hold a candle to the queen of bitchtalking, so throwing stones in glass houses sort of deal. It all depends on whether she can act fast enough to activate her wincon in some way.

Wow, that's a lot of stuff that just doesn't matter if GLaDOS just sets up a laser and kills Polly before she has a chance to respond. Cause chances are, Aperature already has shit under Mystery Mountain!

 

[DimeUhDozen]

Wow, that's a lot of stuff that just doesn't matter if GLaDOS just sets up a laser and kills Polly before she has a chance to respond. Cause chances are, Aperature already has shit under Mystery Mountain!

Polly and GLaDOS both sort of operate under the same strategy of "I'll stay up here in my big undisclosed room where I'm safe and let my tech handle things". So she's somewhere in there, but it's going to take a while to discern where she is or where the laser should shoot, not to mention the mansion's metallic structure, so she's just as likely to activate the time travel wincon/also undoing one attack by cutting the bud at the source. Her actions caused cars to just... not exist anymore and be replaced with pogo sticks, so I can see her get creative with something there. I also thought the lasers took quite a bit to set up the last time you said so.

 

[DaReaperMan]

Polly and GLaDOS both sort of operate under the same strategy of "I'll stay up here in my big undisclosed room where I'm safe and let my tech handle things". So she's somewhere in there, but it's going to take a while to discern where she is or where the laser should shoot, not to mention the mansion's metallic structure, so she's just as likely to activate the time travel wincon/also undoing one attack by cutting the bud at the source. Her actions caused cars to just... not exist anymore and be replaced with pogo sticks, so I can see her get creative with something there. I also thought the lasers took quite a bit to set up the last time you said so.

That's the thing, GLaDOS can very easy just hit everything at once lol

You say that like GLaDOS is short on time to rearrange things until she has her lasers where she wants it, unlike last time when it was a head-on fight

 

[DimeUhDozen]

That's the thing, GLaDOS can very easy just hit everything at once lol

You say that like GLaDOS is short on time to rearrange things until she has her lasers where she wants it, unlike last time when it was a head-on fight

Didn't think it'd be especially crucial to her profile exactly, but this is the exterior of Mystery Mountain. I'm not sure how much AP it would take to pierce it.

 

[DaReaperMan]

Didn't think it'd be especially crucial to her profile exactly, but this is the exterior of Mystery Mountain. I'm not sure how much AP it would take to pierce it.

With one 9-A heat laser? Or like, a couple hundred? Lol

 

[DimeUhDozen]

With one 9-A heat laser? Or like, a couple hundred? Lol

Depends, how long would it take GLaDOS to deploy all of those turrets on the surface?

 

[DaReaperMan]

Depends, how long would it take GLaDOS to deploy all of those turrets on the surface?

Who needs to deploy them on the surface when she can just laser the place from underground? Why give Polly the chance to react?

 

[DimeUhDozen]

Who needs to deploy them on the surface when she can just laser the place from underground? Why give Polly the chance to react?

Damn, this was my only matchup for her too lol.

 

[DaReaperMan]

Damn, this was my only matchup for her too lol.

Yeah, like I said, I can see polly pulling some wins, but GLaDOS definitely has the more reliable wincons IC

 

[DimeUhDozen]

Yeah, like I said, I can see polly pulling some wins, but GLaDOS definitely has the more reliable wincons IC

Well, it sounds more like a stomp if she just immediately lasers the place and there's nothing she can do about it.

 

[DaReaperMan]

Well, it sounds more like a stomp if she just immediately lasers the place and there's nothing she can do about it.

Eh, true