2025 Part 1: Sonic OverHype is Over

[Starsprite53]

Oh yeah, this is happenin'
In the world of battleboarding, people always talk about Sonic (Kirby victim btw) and his high-balled feats. Whether it’s outrunning black holes, defying time, or battling gods, Sonic has been wanked so much, but no matter how many over-the-top feats get piled onto his resume, there’s one truth that remains unshakable: Kirby still solos this fraud, here is why
Downplaygrade time:
"Sonic resists conceptual erasure!"
Sure, but does he resist my disappointment when he beats Solaris in one game but can't jump over spikes in the next? Don't think so.

"Sonic scales to immeasurable speed!"
Sonic only scales to immeasurable speed because the camera can’t keep up in the games. Technical limitations ≠ feats, y’all

"Sonic's spin attack can cut through anything."
Cut through anything? Except for that one wooden door he needs a key for. Maybe he's just being polite(Copium)

"Sonic's Chaos Control can warp reality."
Warp reality? Yet he can't warp himself out of a bad game script. Maybe Chaos Control has a 'no bad writing' clause.

“Hyper Sonic is OP and scales above baseline!”
Also Hyper Sonic: "Sorry, I can't come to the phone right now. Sega left me in the 90s."

"His enemies created multiple dimensions"
Yeah, dimensions of bad level design. I’ll believe it when they creates a dimension where a game isn’t mid.

"Hyper Sonic can destroy universes!"
And yet he can’t destroy SEGA’s refusal to bring him back. Hmm, Curious.

"The Sonic verso has two temporal dimensions immeasurable speed feats!"
Reality: Sonic’s biggest feat is dodging bankruptcy while SEGA fumbles every third release.

"Archie Sonic has unlimited stamina!"
Unlimited stamina, yet he couldn’t outrun cancellation. Truly tragic.

"Archie Sonic is peak fiction!"
Peak fiction? More like a peak fanfiction fever dream. But hey, at least it’s entertaining watching him solo everything via crossovers scaling

Sonic may be the "fastest thing alive," but when it comes to raw, undeniable power, Kirby literally eats that nonsense for breakfast. End of story. Kirby solos.

Agree:
Agree :
Kirby Solos:

 

[Dodecatrihan]

Lend me some statements, pause screen. This is base Classic Sonic we're up against.

 

[Shmooply]

 

[Starsprite53]

Truth

 

[ZothythoTheNephalem]

But can this CRT beat Goku, though?

 

[Starsprite53]

But can this CRT beat Goku, though?

Let’s make one thing clear: Goku solos Sonic with zero effort, no contest, no debate. The sheer absurdity of even suggesting Sonic stands a chance against Goku is laughable at best and an insult to common sense at worst. Goku, who has gone from fighting regular humans to destroying entire galaxies without even breaking a sweat, isn’t going to be fazed by a hedgehog that needs rings to keep running at full speed. Sonic can race through dimensions and do his little speed tricks, but Goku’s speed is beyond anything that could even be measured in the same dimension. When Goku fought Beerus, the God of Destruction, their battle caused the very universe to tremble, and Goku wasn't even at his peak yet. Meanwhile, Sonic struggles to outrun Eggman’s robots—you know, the ones that barely function without his terrible engineering. The level of power Sonic has is laughable in comparison to Goku’s feats. We’re talking about a guy who can erase entire timelines, transcend the limitations of space and time, and completely obliterate beings whose very existence defies the fabric of reality. Sonic might have a few cool tricks with the Chaos Emeralds, but let’s not kid ourselves—those “power-ups” are just a flashy band-aid over a complete lack of real technique or raw power. Goku’s fought gods, destroyed universes, and survived attacks that would turn Sonic into a pink smear on the floor. Sonic’s durability is weak at best, and even his best moves are just glorified speed bumps compared to Goku’s massive arsenal of universe-busting attacks. Sonic may be the “fastest thing alive,” but Goku transcends that concept entirely. When Goku does a Kamehameha, the planet shakes, the stars tremble, and entire galaxies could be in danger. Meanwhile, Sonic’s most impressive feat is dodging the occasional laser beam or running fast enough to save the day—against things that don’t even come close to the destruction Goku causes on accident. Goku doesn't need to try; he doesn't need any fancy gadgets or random power-ups. He’s just that powerful. Goku solos Sonic in every way possible, and there's not a damn thing Sonic can do about it.

 

[Noneless21]

but can sonic beat Yamcha tho?

 

[Newendigo]

The total amount of cringe and cursed material his fandom has delivered from his conception up to this year is truely his most reliable "immeasurable" feat.

 

[Chariot190]

Kirby wins by virtue of not having chart dictating game quality looking like this

 

[The_Unknown_Warrior1]

Sonic's existence is the reason why Sonichu is a thing.

There's no more to say, that is more than enough for me to agree with the CRT and that should be downgraded to 11-C.

 

[Chariot190]

Sonic's existence is the reason why Sonichu is a thing.

There's no more to say, that is more than enough for me to agree with the CRT and that should be downgraded to 11-C.

Kinda ****** up Pokemon is in it's "Sonic in the early 2000s to 2021 phase bar two games" phase atm. Think we should kill both tbh.

 

[Starsprite53]

Sonic's existence is the reason why Sonichu is a thing.

There's no more to say, that is more than enough for me to agree with the CRT and that should be downgraded to 11-C.

Sonic is lariversal

 

[The_Unknown_Warrior1]

Kinda ****** up Pokemon is in it's "Sonic in the early 2000s to 2021 phase bar two games" phase atm. Think we should kill both tbh.

The current state of Pokemon is the result of what happens when you know only success and gold, to be honest. And because of that, since I want to say X/Y honestly, I think Game Freak has allowed themselves to become complacent and less attentive to the quality of Pokemon's quality because they know those games are going to sell regardless of how mediocre they turn out being when released.

 

[ZothythoTheNephalem]

Let’s make one thing clear: Goku solos Sonic with zero effort, no contest, no debate. The sheer absurdity of even suggesting Sonic stands a chance against Goku is laughable at best and an insult to common sense at worst. Goku, who has gone from fighting regular humans to destroying entire galaxies without even breaking a sweat, isn’t going to be fazed by a hedgehog that needs rings to keep running at full speed. Sonic can race through dimensions and do his little speed tricks, but Goku’s speed is beyond anything that could even be measured in the same dimension. When Goku fought Beerus, the God of Destruction, their battle caused the very universe to tremble, and Goku wasn't even at his peak yet. Meanwhile, Sonic struggles to outrun Eggman’s robots—you know, the ones that barely function without his terrible engineering. The level of power Sonic has is laughable in comparison to Goku’s feats. We’re talking about a guy who can erase entire timelines, transcend the limitations of space and time, and completely obliterate beings whose very existence defies the fabric of reality. Sonic might have a few cool tricks with the Chaos Emeralds, but let’s not kid ourselves—those “power-ups” are just a flashy band-aid over a complete lack of real technique or raw power. Goku’s fought gods, destroyed universes, and survived attacks that would turn Sonic into a pink smear on the floor. Sonic’s durability is weak at best, and even his best moves are just glorified speed bumps compared to Goku’s massive arsenal of universe-busting attacks. Sonic may be the “fastest thing alive,” but Goku transcends that concept entirely. When Goku does a Kamehameha, the planet shakes, the stars tremble, and entire galaxies could be in danger. Meanwhile, Sonic’s most impressive feat is dodging the occasional laser beam or running fast enough to save the day—against things that don’t even come close to the destruction Goku causes on accident. Goku doesn't need to try; he doesn't need any fancy gadgets or random power-ups. He’s just that powerful. Goku solos Sonic in every way possible, and there's not a damn thing Sonic can do about it.

Kamehameha isn't canon, actually. It was retconned in Dragon Ball Ultima. Also he lost to Sonic in the very canon Sonic x Dragon Ball Generations.

 

[Sir_Ovens]

Kirby when we have a delightful meal together and he inhales all the food, leaving me with nothing and making me sad

That's why Kirby is bottom fiction and 10-C at best

 

[Noneless21]

both are Mario victim

 

[Theuser789]

 

[ShakeResounding]

You know what? You're RIGHT.

I KNEEL to Reddit.

I KNEEL to 4chan.

I KNEEL to Versus Central.

Downgrade this ******* to Tier 8 PRONTO.

 

[Starsprite53]

You know what? You're RIGHT.

I KNEEL to Reddit.

I KNEEL to 4chan.

I KNEEL to Versus Central.

Downgrade this ******* to Tier 8 PRONTO.

We should gather Sonic's 1991 Anti-Feats

 

[ShionAH]

Ever thought about how the spikes could just be 7th dimensional conceptual, information based layered higher layered metafictional elements? HUH?