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The Shrek Discussion Thread

in the first movie, fiona moves at average human speeds while in midair from her perspective. gravity is so slow from her perspective that she doesn't seem to be falling at all, so i'll do a rough calc for that real quick
she jumps up to the height of the merry men's heads to kick them. the average height of an adult male human is 1.8 meters. apparently 1/8 of the average human's height is their head. 7/8 of 1.8 is 1.575, so she jumped about 1.575 meters into the air.
when time started moving normally again, fiona landed in roughly 1/24 of a second (assuming that this is 24 fps), meaning that she was falling at 37.8 m/s. from her perspective, she wasn't even falling. i'll use the speed of a snail (0.001 m/s) to represent her falling speed during bullet time. also, i'll use the speed of a human for her movements during bullet time, since she appears to be moving normally.
(37.8 / 0.001) * 5 = 189000
this means that fiona and everyone she scales to can casually move at 189000 m/s. massively hypersonic shrek confirmed.
 
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in the first movie, fiona moves at average human speeds while in midair from her perspective. gravity is so slow from her perspective that she doesn't seem to be falling at all, so i'll do a rough calc for that real quick
she jumps up to the height of the merry men's heads to kick them. the average height of an adult male human is 1.8 meters. apparently 1/8 of the average human's height is their head. 7/8 of 1.8 is 1.575, so she jumped about 1.575 meters into the air.
when time started moving normally again, fiona landed in roughly 1/24 of a second (assuming that this is 24 fps), meaning that she was falling at 37.8 m/s. from her perspective, she wasn't even falling. i'll use the speed of a snail (0.001 m/s) to represent her falling speed during bullet time. also, i'll use the speed of a human for her movements during bullet time, since she appears to be moving normally.
(37.8 / 0.001) * 5 = 189000
this means that fiona and everyone she scales to can casually move at 189000 m/s. massively hypersonic shrek confirmed.
if he's that fast, he could be anywhere at any given moment, he could appear behind you at any second and you wouldn't even know it because he's faster than the eye can see
I mean, Puss dodged an electric based magic attack once.
I'm joking, Puss' feat would probably be like around Supersonic I think, I don't know, I think it would depend on if they are shooting either electricity or literal lightning bolts, so MHS Shrek is still a possibility I guess.
My ******* reaction right now.

That's genuinely ******* scary, I'm ************* Schrecken for life if this is layered.

A TOAST TO THE OGRELORD (SLAZO WOULD BE PROUD).
 
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ALL HAIL THE TRUE GOD SHREK!!
 
does anybody approve or object my calculation?
It seems fine actually, though it depends it could be on a 'possibly' if there wasn't more comparable feats? I mean I'll still have to bring up the lightning looking feat from FG again. its brought up that Harold also dodging it means it couldn't work because an aged man dodged it means its slow but in a verse like this when we do see FG's magic in action its still shown to not be slow in the slightest (keep in mind Fiona's mum alone is very VERY capable let me tell ya.)
 
download-2.png

ALL HAIL THE TRUE GOD SHREK!!
Also I discovered something ******* funny. Now this iceberg is in the taco language but thankfully I'm here to translate: For those of you who don't know Banderas actually voiced Puss in several languages like Spanish (obviously), Italian... and curiously enough, JAPANESE, yes apparently Banderas/Puss is also a suave in Japanese protagonist and its as close as we'll get to an actual anime of Shurekku-Sama.


9oj3uvvipme41.jpg


Also am I the only one who thought Dio looked like and was potentially Prince Charming's descendent? If anything the Shrek saga and JoJo saga probably had that walking dead and toy story hidden similarities thing.
 
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tell me about it, we've had serious discussions about ******* cool cat
The one with boogie woogie Daddy Derek?... I do vaguely remember this Cool Cat actually get his own file... Somehow... Which got deleted and replaced with Looney Tune's Cool Cat.

Then again we did have Annoying Orange, Markiplier's series, and Tobuscus in this site still. Someone I REALLY wanted to see in this site again is the AVGN. AVGN was unironically powerful enough to be unironically pitted against Goku, and unironically there was some good laughs and one good meme templete of AVGN hunting down every other weeb character mostly holding Sauseke by the throat:

om1s1fw8chf51.jpg
 
So while looking around on netflix i found a short series called Dreamworks Spooky Stories.
It's pretty much just Shreks friends telling him spooky stories on halloween in an attempt to scare him.
i'm watching it RN and i'm about 10 minutes in tho it doesn't seem like there are any notable feats
 
So while looking around on netflix i found a short series called Dreamworks Spooky Stories.
It's pretty much just Shreks friends telling him spooky stories on halloween in an attempt to scare him.
i'm watching it RN and i'm about 10 minutes in tho it doesn't seem like there are any notable feats
In that one if you haven't seen it yet, Pinocchio does make a hole exactly in his shape. It could still be wall, but accordingly making holes exactly in a person's shape is a huge one and the door does look pretty dummy thicc.
 
Bump... So the snail thing seems like a dud according to Matt its rather wank... what about the mountain carving feat? Shrek at least has a chance to be upgraded in AP/Dura and say what you would say currently but those speed feats could also one day.
 
Bump... So the snail thing seems like a dud according to Matt its rather wank... what about the mountain carving feat? Shrek at least has a chance to be upgraded in AP/Dura and say what you would say currently but those speed feats could also one day.
I don't think that was the problem. The actual problems were:
  1. Using snail speed seems like heavy guesswork. Nullified by the fact that I'm revising it again with pixel measurements of how slow the Merry Men actually moved.
  2. Thelonious did the same thing to Fiona, and Fiona tagged him, making this all a contradictory mess that shouldn't be touched. Nullified by Thelonious essentially being cornered and clearly wanting to be attacked, as he was moaning that he deserved every hit.
Dragon already has a 9-A+ calc for her tail, which Shrek should scale to since he could hold it down for a brief period of time. Shrek can survive dragonfire, which is already 9-A since it can skeletonize armored men, and in the comics he survived an explosion that turned a factory into ash. Get an admin in here. Spread the news. Shrek is 9-A, and if you say otherwise, it's all ogre for you.
 
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