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He's the guy on the right.
Newcomer: Bink VS. Superman(Pre-Crisis)
I had half a mind to mark this as "Fun & Games." I figured that, since I do seriously intend on their being some sort of confrontation between these two and want to hear some more opinions on it, it belonged with the Versus Threads, but this is not what I'd call a normal confrontation, and those who have read Xanth know exactly why.
It's probably the weirdest, most unorthodox David and Goliath match-up to ever pop into my mind, and I consider pitting 9-B, athlete speed characters against planet-level villains with FTL+ speed to be possibly fair.
Bink is the main character of most of the Xanth series, a line of books about a magical dimension in the shape of Florida where everyone has some sort of magical spell, called a Talent. Unlike everyone else, who are gifted with fireballs, flight, and bad ideas (they're not all winners), Bink's Talent is "Bink Can't Be Harmed by Magical Causes." It sounds like fairly standard antimagic, but it's far, far, stronger than that.
The magic blocks both direct and indirect magical harm, so ogres throwing rocks, illusions hiding pits, and the deaths of loved ones are covered (emotional harm is serious business, y'know). Considering that very little of Xanth is non-magical in some way, his power becomes more like "Bink can only be harmed by completely mundane causes." However, since this spell considers its inaction in the face of danger to be a way for Bink to be hurt by magic (like any great lawyer would), it does all it can to work around this weakness as well by disguising itself. Instead of a magical bubble or something else obvious, all of its protection comes in the guise of extremely strange luck, hiding its identity via either distracting coincidences or short-circuiting means of divination relating to its identity.
In a weird combination of unconcsious Reality Warping, Acausality, and Toon Force, Bink is always able to survive whatever dumb situation he's in, no matter what, through sheer dumb luck. He is nigh-invulnerable, and the only drawback to his power is that he winds up looking like a buffoon after every single encounter. Cuts, scrapes, and clothing damage are not considered "harm" by the spell, and every encounter is a practice in slapstick comedy.
The end result: a 10-A character with a form of plot armor he has no control over that protects his body, but not his dignity, using a combination of the Gambit Roulette and Xanatos Speed Chess to thwart dragons, sorceresses, "evil" magicians, basilisks, and even the demon who granted him his powers.
That's your intro to Bink.
Rules
Both combatants completely in character (Bink is just as humble, perky, and Lawful/Stupid as always).
The win conditions are Bink's death or Superman conceding, voluntarily or otherwise (death is unlikely, but possible).
The setting is Metropolis city, right outside the Daily Planet. It's just as populated as ever, and all the other supers are feeling antsy Today.
'Verse Equalization rules are: 1) Xanth's magic is flowing through the city. Bink has his powers, but nothing of interest has happened to everyone else as of right now. Perhaps in a generation or two, but as of now, this only benefits Bink. 2) I doubt it'll do anything, but Xanth magic = DC magic as far as weaknesses and resistances go. Bink has no "attack spell," but maybe there's some sort of rules-interaction with Supes I don't know about.
What sort of BS chain of comical, hideously unlikely ass-pulls do you think will cost Superman the match, and how many innocent bystanders do you think are going to die in the process?
