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Harry and Marv vs a chimp (two idiots vs a chimp)

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Frieza_force_soldier_100

Frieza_force_soldier_100

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Harry and Marv have broken into a house to rob the place, but the pet chimp is there and escapes from its cage to attack the intruders.

Harry and Marv are both in character and have crowbars. Victory conditions are Harry and Marv killing the chimp or the chimp killing, knocking out, or chasing Harry and Marv out of the house. Both Harry and Marv have to be defeated for it to count as a win for the chimp. If one gets killed or knocked out but the other kills the chimp, it counts as a tie.

Harry and Marv

Chimpanzee
 
Yeah, I'm pretty sure the Chimpanzee would most likely take this. They're pretty clever at pulling traps and pranks; plus Harry and Marv are both quite gullible. Considering all the trouble they have with Kevin Mallacilister, the Chimpanzee also has Peak Human Strength to go with their brains; meaning some occasional head on encounters might knock them by surprise as well. And in the end, I think the Chimp might fight away to get the wet bandits locked in his cage so he can torment them more.

Voting the Chimp for those reasons.
 
They do, but that only means they're difficult to kill; they can still get knocked around and all that jazz.
 
Though with their incredible durability and stamina, they could possibly tire the chimp down overtime through sheer attrition, though the chimp also has a lot of stamina and could knock them out or chase them out of the house before that happens.
 
I dunno. Chimpanzees are also stronger when it comes to pulling and lifting, which should probably add to things being in favor of the chimp along with some of the other points here.
 
Yes, the crowbars, along with their durability and stamina, are what keeps this from being a stomp in the little guy's favor. He is much stronger than either of them, probably stronger than both of them combined. Same goes for his speed. I also wouldn't be surprised if he could outwit at least Marv (who is so stupid that he often makes Harry look smart or at least average in intelligence by comparison). However, their great durability and stamina could possibly allow them to gradually wear the chimp down through sheer attrition, and if they manage any lucky blows with their crownars, the tables could turn (Marv once hit Harry by accident while tying to kill a tarantula, but the chimp would be easier to hit due to being a bigger target). You also have to remember that it's two against one.
 
I honestly despise the amount of wank chimpanzees get (yes, I know that sounds like a weird thing to happen, but it does).

There is no way in Hell a chimp could ever outsmart a human being except in extremely specific circumstances, even ones as gullible as the Wet Bandits.

The chimp detects intruders in the house, rushes to intercept and proceeds to get his face bashed in by crowbars. Even if he somehow takes down one of the crooks (he can't actually do significant harm to them due to their durability), the other one will likely have plenty of time to kill him. Superhuman endurance and pain resistance aren't going to stop a weapon that can casually break ribs and puncture organs in singular hits.

The only real chance the chimp has here is scaring the Bandits out of the house because it's a chimp, and even then, as hilarious as that sounds, seems highly implausible.
 
And Hell, that's actually the best case scenario for the chimp, assuming it comes down to a melee brawl. The Bandits can easily grab something larger from the house or just lay a basic trap of their own the moment they figure out what's going on.
 
As a side note, keeping an adult chimp locked up in your house is about as smart as keeping a tiger or a bear
 
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