- 3,610
- 390
Sup guys, here's a CRT where I downgrade a post-apocalyptic TV show verse from 9-C to 10-B/10-A
Hey, I've seen this one! This is a classic!
The Eternaut is a very recent verse that is just massively wanked and the profiles are low-quality. There is just, so much wrong with the pages that I lowkey don't know where to start. Not to shit on the guy who made it but yeah I gotta do something about that. Fair warning, there are not a lot of clips of this show online despite it being pretty popular so most of these sources are kinda ass or simply nonexistent, but please work with me here.
Juan Salvo (Profile):
Juan is 9-C because he... kicked open a door... that was dubiously closed?
Keep in mind that Juan is almost certainly in his 60's, given that he was a young man during the Malvinas / Falklands War, a war from 1982 where 49 percent of the Argentinian soldiers were 19-20 years of age, and given that the show takes place in 2025, that would put Juan at around 63-62. His actor is also 68. Street level is preposterous for a man that age in a verse that has very grounded human characters. Not to mention that the door kicking feat is total BS.
Juan's only real physical feat is surviving this, frankly brutal, car crash. I still don't think this is enough for 9-C, considering the previously mentioned context of the show and the fact that it's not impossible to survive such a thing. Also, in the last episode, another character (Omar), who we have no reason to suspect is weaker than Juan, is stabbed and it puts him in critical condition. Street Level characters are supposed to survive stuff like that.
Regardless, Juan is spry for being in his 60's and has physically threatened other men of his age, though he's never come to blows with anyone. Given that he never prepared for the apocalypse, and that it's been 43 years since the war he participated in, I think 10-B is a fair rating.
Juan takes out a guy with one hit to the head. He's 10-A.
Moving on to his abilities:
Martial Arts normally works for soldiers because they train Combatives or some shit. Argentine soldiers in the war Juan participated in certainly did not have this luxury. Consider how, even in the modern USA, Army Combatives is usually seen as a shitty, ineffective, bare-bones martial art that's barely practiced (because you have a gun, just shoot them) and is more so there to give soldiers a very basic feel of hand to hand fighting.
Therefore, you can imagine that the 1982 army of a third world country (mostly comprised of regular teenagers/young adults, including Juan) fighting a war that was planned terribly probably didn't waste any time teaching their soldiers any effective fighting style at all. Juan also doesn't so much as throw a punch in the show. Actually, I just found it, the Argentine army has only started teaching hand to hand combat in 2018. No shot Juan knows martial arts.
Preparation for just putting a flashlight on his gun is funny. He and his team make a whole ass suit that covers him from the toxic snow and thats the best example we can come up with?
Alongside his Perception Manip and Precognition, he should have Retrocognition too. For some context, Juan can see the future and past whenever he gets his PTSD panic attacks. He has no control over them, they're stuff like brief flashes of him being in a trench, or looking at his daughter or something. He doesn't even realize that he can see the future in this way until the very final episode. I wanted to make this clear so that we can add all this context to the page.
Stealth Mastery for locking himself in a room in "Step into the Sun" is dumb. I don't remember him hiding from bandits in "Magnetism" and given the contents of the page so far I'm taking a wild guess by saying its probably not some solid snake type shit that would warrant considering him a MASTER of stealth.
I don't have to explain why berserk mode for getting angry at people isn't very convincing lol
And shouldn't he have resistance to extreme cold and radiation from the makeshift suit that he wears 24/7 and helps him survive in the toxic snow?
As for his Intelligence: Over half of the justifications in the page rn are just basic preparation stuff that you or me could come up with, like putting a revolver in his backpack or telling his wife to stay home during the apocalypse lol. The only good one he has is breaking the window to scare off his attackers who had him cornered and using the revolver he packed to attempt to intimidate an entire building's worth of people who wanted to take off his mask (This one's not even on the page). I think "Average, Above Average in combat situations" would be fair given that he's good with guns and these two other feats.
Athletic Human LS for carrying a backpack is a new one. Average human is already 50kg/110lb at MINIMUM. Average Human is fine.
His equipment is just wrong (where the hell would he get a japanese police force revolver? lol). A lot of the guns he uses are relatively obscure Argentinian guns that we don't have a page for. Funnily enough, the one gun that he DOES use and we DO have a page for, the FN FAL, is not listed on his profile.
Anyways, according to these videos (thank you random argentinian gun fanatic for making these) he uses a Colt Cobra revolver (slightly smaller version of colt detective special), his shotgun is the argentinian Bataan 71 (based on the Ithaca 37), and he later picks up the FAL from a dead body. This rifle he holds MIGHT BE the Heckler & Koch G3 like the page says (apparently it's used by Argentinian SWAT) but I'm no expert on the matter and the video doesn't talk about it. I think it's plausible, though.
Finally, his weaknesses. Most of them are dubiously wrong.
Juan doesn't dislike guns to the point that it becomes a weakness. He doesn't take the winchester rifle from Favalli because it reminds him of the war, yes, but he still packs the revolver to be cautious. And there's no reason for him to pick up the dead cop's gun when... he already has the revolver...
He's no more empathetic than any normal person. They list helping Ingrid as a weakness when, given the situation (her being trapped in the garage at the beggining of the apocalypse and needing the group's help) most people would help her, though with caution (which they do, they pick up their guns just in case). If anything it pays off because Ingrid is a great teammate and sticks with them for the rest of the show.
Giving the bottle of water to the survivors in the train cart is all in all a reasonable action given that they were desperately begging him for help. I wouldn't call it a weakness.
They actually missed a weakness of him that is pretty apparent in the show. Juan, due to his age, needs to take pills for... something. I don't remember what it is, frankly. But it's the reason why he and his wife go to the pharmacy and later get robbed there.
Almost done, just one more thing. His profile should be called "Juan Salvo (Netflix Adaptation)" because he, technically, is not "The Eternaut™" yet. That word is never even said in the show, because it hasn't yet adapted the part of the original comic that explains what an Eternaut even is. And also this is his incarnation from the netflix adaptation of the comic.
Alfredo Favalli (Profile)
This might be the most wanked "regular person profile" I have ever seen, with Juan being a close second
For the same reason as I mentioned with Juan, I don't believe Alfredo to be 9-C. There's even less of a justification for him to be 9-C because in the final episode he reveals he wasn't allowed to be in the army because of his poor physical condition (which the profile lists as a weakness, kind of). His supposed WALL LEVEL durability feat of "surviving being squeezed by a beetle alien" is actually just him being dragged around by it for like 5 seconds before someone else scares it away. Off to a great start.
His "feat" of disarming Omar before he could react is complete BS because the rifle Omar is pointing at him is empty and Alfredo knows this. Omar tries to threaten him, Alfredo looks at him and angrily grabs it from Omar with basically no resistance. He then calls him an idiot and says the rifle isn't even cocked. None of this is a speed or LS feat.
Regarding vehicular mastery, the soldiers don't actually shoot at Alfredo while he's in his car. They're shooting at the alien beetles, but because of the low visibility due to the snow, Alfredo thinks they're shooting at him. It would also make no sense for these soldiers to completely miss a whole ass car that is, at most, half a block away. He does learn pretty quickly how to operate a railroad, but that's more of an intelligence feat than anything since someone else was explaining it to him, he didn't figure it out by himself
Preparation is fine but not for the reasons given, simply being things like an engineer isn't enough for preparation. But Alfredo is a hoarder and kind of a prepper, and all the stuff he's accumulated over the years is helpful for the group in numerous occasions, so it can stay under that reasoning. Also, I'm pretty sure alfredo simply isnt mentioned to be a physics teacher like the profile says and is instead just an electronic engineer. Maybe it was added because he is one in the comic (I don't know, I haven't read it, please don't spoil it for me) or maybe I missed it but I dont believe this incarnation of him is one.
Stealth Mastery for just stepping behind someone while aiming a gun at them and making a mask in a huge house without people noticing is dumb
Social Influencing for leadership is fine but the justifications are once again ass, stuff like just giving someone a rifle lol. He just acts as the leader of the group because he's a prepper, knows shit, and acts quick under pressure
Genius intelligence is too much. Alfredo is quick to pick up on how the snow works, can repair radios and, after a few days, was able to deduce that the snow came from the Van Allen radiation belt after seeing how his compass, and therefore, the north and south pole, stopped working. He's also an okay leader. Rather than genius, this seems more like gifted to me.
Finally, alongside the winchester rifle, he also uses the Bataan 71 shotgun like Juan, and also the Beretta 92.
That's it
Hey, I've seen this one! This is a classic!
The Eternaut is a very recent verse that is just massively wanked and the profiles are low-quality. There is just, so much wrong with the pages that I lowkey don't know where to start. Not to shit on the guy who made it but yeah I gotta do something about that. Fair warning, there are not a lot of clips of this show online despite it being pretty popular so most of these sources are kinda ass or simply nonexistent, but please work with me here.
Juan Salvo (Profile):
Juan is 9-C because he... kicked open a door... that was dubiously closed?
Keep in mind that Juan is almost certainly in his 60's, given that he was a young man during the Malvinas / Falklands War, a war from 1982 where 49 percent of the Argentinian soldiers were 19-20 years of age, and given that the show takes place in 2025, that would put Juan at around 63-62. His actor is also 68. Street level is preposterous for a man that age in a verse that has very grounded human characters. Not to mention that the door kicking feat is total BS.
Juan's only real physical feat is surviving this, frankly brutal, car crash. I still don't think this is enough for 9-C, considering the previously mentioned context of the show and the fact that it's not impossible to survive such a thing. Also, in the last episode, another character (Omar), who we have no reason to suspect is weaker than Juan, is stabbed and it puts him in critical condition. Street Level characters are supposed to survive stuff like that.
Juan takes out a guy with one hit to the head. He's 10-A.
Moving on to his abilities:
Martial Arts normally works for soldiers because they train Combatives or some shit. Argentine soldiers in the war Juan participated in certainly did not have this luxury. Consider how, even in the modern USA, Army Combatives is usually seen as a shitty, ineffective, bare-bones martial art that's barely practiced (because you have a gun, just shoot them) and is more so there to give soldiers a very basic feel of hand to hand fighting.
Therefore, you can imagine that the 1982 army of a third world country (mostly comprised of regular teenagers/young adults, including Juan) fighting a war that was planned terribly probably didn't waste any time teaching their soldiers any effective fighting style at all. Juan also doesn't so much as throw a punch in the show. Actually, I just found it, the Argentine army has only started teaching hand to hand combat in 2018. No shot Juan knows martial arts.
Preparation for just putting a flashlight on his gun is funny. He and his team make a whole ass suit that covers him from the toxic snow and thats the best example we can come up with?
Alongside his Perception Manip and Precognition, he should have Retrocognition too. For some context, Juan can see the future and past whenever he gets his PTSD panic attacks. He has no control over them, they're stuff like brief flashes of him being in a trench, or looking at his daughter or something. He doesn't even realize that he can see the future in this way until the very final episode. I wanted to make this clear so that we can add all this context to the page.
Stealth Mastery for locking himself in a room in "Step into the Sun" is dumb. I don't remember him hiding from bandits in "Magnetism" and given the contents of the page so far I'm taking a wild guess by saying its probably not some solid snake type shit that would warrant considering him a MASTER of stealth.
I don't have to explain why berserk mode for getting angry at people isn't very convincing lol
And shouldn't he have resistance to extreme cold and radiation from the makeshift suit that he wears 24/7 and helps him survive in the toxic snow?
As for his Intelligence: Over half of the justifications in the page rn are just basic preparation stuff that you or me could come up with, like putting a revolver in his backpack or telling his wife to stay home during the apocalypse lol. The only good one he has is breaking the window to scare off his attackers who had him cornered and using the revolver he packed to attempt to intimidate an entire building's worth of people who wanted to take off his mask (This one's not even on the page). I think "Average, Above Average in combat situations" would be fair given that he's good with guns and these two other feats.
Athletic Human LS for carrying a backpack is a new one. Average human is already 50kg/110lb at MINIMUM. Average Human is fine.
His equipment is just wrong (where the hell would he get a japanese police force revolver? lol). A lot of the guns he uses are relatively obscure Argentinian guns that we don't have a page for. Funnily enough, the one gun that he DOES use and we DO have a page for, the FN FAL, is not listed on his profile.
Anyways, according to these videos (thank you random argentinian gun fanatic for making these) he uses a Colt Cobra revolver (slightly smaller version of colt detective special), his shotgun is the argentinian Bataan 71 (based on the Ithaca 37), and he later picks up the FAL from a dead body. This rifle he holds MIGHT BE the Heckler & Koch G3 like the page says (apparently it's used by Argentinian SWAT) but I'm no expert on the matter and the video doesn't talk about it. I think it's plausible, though.
Finally, his weaknesses. Most of them are dubiously wrong.
Juan doesn't dislike guns to the point that it becomes a weakness. He doesn't take the winchester rifle from Favalli because it reminds him of the war, yes, but he still packs the revolver to be cautious. And there's no reason for him to pick up the dead cop's gun when... he already has the revolver...
He's no more empathetic than any normal person. They list helping Ingrid as a weakness when, given the situation (her being trapped in the garage at the beggining of the apocalypse and needing the group's help) most people would help her, though with caution (which they do, they pick up their guns just in case). If anything it pays off because Ingrid is a great teammate and sticks with them for the rest of the show.
Giving the bottle of water to the survivors in the train cart is all in all a reasonable action given that they were desperately begging him for help. I wouldn't call it a weakness.
They actually missed a weakness of him that is pretty apparent in the show. Juan, due to his age, needs to take pills for... something. I don't remember what it is, frankly. But it's the reason why he and his wife go to the pharmacy and later get robbed there.
Almost done, just one more thing. His profile should be called "Juan Salvo (Netflix Adaptation)" because he, technically, is not "The Eternaut™" yet. That word is never even said in the show, because it hasn't yet adapted the part of the original comic that explains what an Eternaut even is. And also this is his incarnation from the netflix adaptation of the comic.
Alfredo Favalli (Profile)
This might be the most wanked "regular person profile" I have ever seen, with Juan being a close second
For the same reason as I mentioned with Juan, I don't believe Alfredo to be 9-C. There's even less of a justification for him to be 9-C because in the final episode he reveals he wasn't allowed to be in the army because of his poor physical condition (which the profile lists as a weakness, kind of). His supposed WALL LEVEL durability feat of "surviving being squeezed by a beetle alien" is actually just him being dragged around by it for like 5 seconds before someone else scares it away. Off to a great start.
His "feat" of disarming Omar before he could react is complete BS because the rifle Omar is pointing at him is empty and Alfredo knows this. Omar tries to threaten him, Alfredo looks at him and angrily grabs it from Omar with basically no resistance. He then calls him an idiot and says the rifle isn't even cocked. None of this is a speed or LS feat.
Regarding vehicular mastery, the soldiers don't actually shoot at Alfredo while he's in his car. They're shooting at the alien beetles, but because of the low visibility due to the snow, Alfredo thinks they're shooting at him. It would also make no sense for these soldiers to completely miss a whole ass car that is, at most, half a block away. He does learn pretty quickly how to operate a railroad, but that's more of an intelligence feat than anything since someone else was explaining it to him, he didn't figure it out by himself
Preparation is fine but not for the reasons given, simply being things like an engineer isn't enough for preparation. But Alfredo is a hoarder and kind of a prepper, and all the stuff he's accumulated over the years is helpful for the group in numerous occasions, so it can stay under that reasoning. Also, I'm pretty sure alfredo simply isnt mentioned to be a physics teacher like the profile says and is instead just an electronic engineer. Maybe it was added because he is one in the comic (I don't know, I haven't read it, please don't spoil it for me) or maybe I missed it but I dont believe this incarnation of him is one.
Stealth Mastery for just stepping behind someone while aiming a gun at them and making a mask in a huge house without people noticing is dumb
Social Influencing for leadership is fine but the justifications are once again ass, stuff like just giving someone a rifle lol. He just acts as the leader of the group because he's a prepper, knows shit, and acts quick under pressure
Genius intelligence is too much. Alfredo is quick to pick up on how the snow works, can repair radios and, after a few days, was able to deduce that the snow came from the Van Allen radiation belt after seeing how his compass, and therefore, the north and south pole, stopped working. He's also an okay leader. Rather than genius, this seems more like gifted to me.
Finally, alongside the winchester rifle, he also uses the Bataan 71 shotgun like Juan, and also the Beretta 92.
That's it
Last edited:
