- 3,108
- 3,544
More or less what it says on the tin, in the style of what you could imagine the Death Battle crew doing. I'm also making this as an expansion of both my custom previews thread AND my old end puns thread.
EDIT (for people who want the common equipment):
Allow me to use Mumkhar vs Zoda as an example:
Boomstick: "Wait, face units aren't lactose intolerant, are they? What was that about removed organs?"
Wiz: "...Topic for another time, Boomstick... eh, in what actually matters, while Zoda's level of raw power with the Reactor Might was alarming (MORE than capable of leaving his opponent in a wreckage if given the opportunity), the flexibility of Mechon technology allowed Mumkhar and Metal Face to carve out a win more often than not. We elected to break this down into four categories, starting with Power."
Boomstick: "Yeah, we weren't joshing when we mentioned how powerful those Reactor Mights are on paper! Ol' Metal may be able to threaten towns and cities, whilst boxing with what remains of the Monado, but Zoda surviving inside that Dark Matter reactor that created a galaxy-spanning blast was insane! Surely that alone would have netted our ice-cream loving purple hulk a win, right?"
CORNER BOX: "While there are versions of this fight that would give Mumkhar the power advantage if allowing for scaling via Project X Zone's interpretation of KOS-MOS from Xenosaga, it's questionable which version of her scaling would be applied here. The viability of Xenosaga III's continuity is shaky enough as is..."
Wiz: "In some circumstances, sure, but the devil is in the details when discussing how that overlaps with other categories such as Speed. Not only do the faced Mechon have the ability to travel the length of the Bionis and Mechonis in a mere few hours, but after the incident outside the Colony 6 mines when Shulk brute-forced Monado I into the face armour (a scenario that is flagrantly unreliable), the repairs were performed by Vanea, who explicitly tipped-off Fiora about light-speed travel being something the Machina can perform with their technology*. Compare this to Zoda's Death Anchor, who without assistance, caps out at around Mach 3... around 273,000x slower."
*CORNER BOX: "It doesn't really make logical sense for Machina scientists like Vanea or Linada to specify 'light speed', if they didn't have access to technology that allowed for that level of speed."
Boomstick: "Oof! But wait, isn't this without the Reactor Mights? Haven't those things been shown to close speed gaps in a jiffy?"
Wiz: "Yes and no. While it's true that the way the Reactor Mights interact with the technology of the F-Zero series allows for interstellar travel, are we really so pernicious enough to imply Zoda could find one of these mediums in the middle of a zero-sum fight? And even if you want to argue that Metal Face's own speed scaling shouldn't be taken so literally, it's still worth noting the lightning he's dodged from Alvis's pet Telethia - a being capable of reading the mind. That, and it's explicitly stated that organic matter could still be found in the Mechon central nerve units, despite the re-configuring of Homs bodies to facilitate the Faces."
Boomstick: "Yep, and this is one of the areas where researching this matchup kinda surprised us, alongside intelligence - where Zoda... is kind of a moron with a Bazooka."
Wiz: "Short-sighted, childish, a constant history of strained or broken relationships with allies, all exemplified by the final fight with Black Shadow, where it took him too long to realize that the bull was holding out on him*. Meanwhile Mumkhar, whilst not exactly some exemplary genius himself, is adept at getting into the heads of people smarter than him, even bragging about his own memory of who is who. Those too eager to engage the Mechon and a likely mob at his beck and call is exactly the kind of fight Mumkhar would excel at, whilst tracks with 40 racers like what Zoda has to deal with have been an... inconsistent endeavour for the purple hulk."
*CORNER BOX: "Notice the number of Reactor Mights in that scene. This, and Black Shadow has worked around power discrepancies similar to this before, simply on a count of the Black Bull's general build and structure."
Boomstick: "And that is where we come to our final category! And not only is the number of hax and resistances at Mumkhar's disposal his final advantage, it even cuts into how much Zoda's raw power really matters, believe it or not!"
Wiz: "The Mechon's ability to decompose living tissue and inflict poison upon a then-unshackled vessel of Zanza in Arglas proves Mumkhar's ability to scam wins he has no business taking, as well as the ability to stun large crowds through his ranged options, making it well within his means to camp out what advantages Zoda may have with the Death Anchor and Reactor Mights. This poison affliction is something that Zoda has basically no answer for, meaning that he'd get worn down in an attempt to swat his opponent out of the sky. By comparison, the only notable thing that Zoda has outside of the Death Anchor is brute force, and an ability to manipulate memories... hardly a factor for Mumkhar in a fight like this, when spiting Dunban seems to be his one drive in life. Hell, Zoda's misuse of his power to implant or revise memories is what got Ryu Suzaku reunited with Haruka in the first place."
Boomstick: "You'd expect the Reactor Mights to do a lot of good here! But unfortunately for Zoda specifically, it's not the first time even one of those snitches has attempted to take him over*. I mean, sure, face units have experienced fatigue before (just look at Fiora), this doesn't apply to Mumkhar by any stretch of the imagination. Hell, MK Ultra over here has had to deal with the defences of Prison Island bypassing what defences he thought he had - and it's only led to him getting back up more pissed off than hurt."
*CORNER BOX: "Keep in mind, this is just one singular Reactor Might, meanwhile the blast from the Dark Matter Reactor is better substantiated by all six of the Reactor Mights being in close proximity."
*CORNER BOX (2): "It's tempting to call a higher-tiered Zoda driven by a Reactor Might an outlier, but in actuality, it's more accurate to just mention that Ryu Suzaku and Falcon have better control over the Reactor Mights than Zoda does, with better training."
Wiz: "All of this means that Zoda does not have consistent access to the closest thing we could call a win condition for him in this fight, at the risk of same dragging on long enough for the power of the Reactor Might recoiling on him. And while it's apt to point out scenarios where Mumkhar has to win that proverbial neutral several times, given the tools at his disposal, it's not unreasonable to imagine him doing so in half of these cases. At Zoda's best, he was certainly a high hurdle for Mumkhar to overcome, but the first Face Mechon's blazing speed, poison inducement and greater tactical acumen led to one race Zoda couldn't bring himself to finish."
Boomstick: "Wipe that scar off your face, Zoda! The podium isn't the claw of the issue!"
Wiz: "The winner is Metal Face."
EDIT (for people who want the common equipment):
Order up:
(5-Category version):
(Who wins? Who loses?)
(Winner bar):
Will Edit OP with this post. 1 moment.
Allow me to use Mumkhar vs Zoda as an example:
Boomstick: "Wait, face units aren't lactose intolerant, are they? What was that about removed organs?"
Wiz: "...Topic for another time, Boomstick... eh, in what actually matters, while Zoda's level of raw power with the Reactor Might was alarming (MORE than capable of leaving his opponent in a wreckage if given the opportunity), the flexibility of Mechon technology allowed Mumkhar and Metal Face to carve out a win more often than not. We elected to break this down into four categories, starting with Power."
Boomstick: "Yeah, we weren't joshing when we mentioned how powerful those Reactor Mights are on paper! Ol' Metal may be able to threaten towns and cities, whilst boxing with what remains of the Monado, but Zoda surviving inside that Dark Matter reactor that created a galaxy-spanning blast was insane! Surely that alone would have netted our ice-cream loving purple hulk a win, right?"
CORNER BOX: "While there are versions of this fight that would give Mumkhar the power advantage if allowing for scaling via Project X Zone's interpretation of KOS-MOS from Xenosaga, it's questionable which version of her scaling would be applied here. The viability of Xenosaga III's continuity is shaky enough as is..."
Wiz: "In some circumstances, sure, but the devil is in the details when discussing how that overlaps with other categories such as Speed. Not only do the faced Mechon have the ability to travel the length of the Bionis and Mechonis in a mere few hours, but after the incident outside the Colony 6 mines when Shulk brute-forced Monado I into the face armour (a scenario that is flagrantly unreliable), the repairs were performed by Vanea, who explicitly tipped-off Fiora about light-speed travel being something the Machina can perform with their technology*. Compare this to Zoda's Death Anchor, who without assistance, caps out at around Mach 3... around 273,000x slower."
*CORNER BOX: "It doesn't really make logical sense for Machina scientists like Vanea or Linada to specify 'light speed', if they didn't have access to technology that allowed for that level of speed."
Boomstick: "Oof! But wait, isn't this without the Reactor Mights? Haven't those things been shown to close speed gaps in a jiffy?"
Wiz: "Yes and no. While it's true that the way the Reactor Mights interact with the technology of the F-Zero series allows for interstellar travel, are we really so pernicious enough to imply Zoda could find one of these mediums in the middle of a zero-sum fight? And even if you want to argue that Metal Face's own speed scaling shouldn't be taken so literally, it's still worth noting the lightning he's dodged from Alvis's pet Telethia - a being capable of reading the mind. That, and it's explicitly stated that organic matter could still be found in the Mechon central nerve units, despite the re-configuring of Homs bodies to facilitate the Faces."
Boomstick: "Yep, and this is one of the areas where researching this matchup kinda surprised us, alongside intelligence - where Zoda... is kind of a moron with a Bazooka."
Wiz: "Short-sighted, childish, a constant history of strained or broken relationships with allies, all exemplified by the final fight with Black Shadow, where it took him too long to realize that the bull was holding out on him*. Meanwhile Mumkhar, whilst not exactly some exemplary genius himself, is adept at getting into the heads of people smarter than him, even bragging about his own memory of who is who. Those too eager to engage the Mechon and a likely mob at his beck and call is exactly the kind of fight Mumkhar would excel at, whilst tracks with 40 racers like what Zoda has to deal with have been an... inconsistent endeavour for the purple hulk."
*CORNER BOX: "Notice the number of Reactor Mights in that scene. This, and Black Shadow has worked around power discrepancies similar to this before, simply on a count of the Black Bull's general build and structure."
Boomstick: "And that is where we come to our final category! And not only is the number of hax and resistances at Mumkhar's disposal his final advantage, it even cuts into how much Zoda's raw power really matters, believe it or not!"
Wiz: "The Mechon's ability to decompose living tissue and inflict poison upon a then-unshackled vessel of Zanza in Arglas proves Mumkhar's ability to scam wins he has no business taking, as well as the ability to stun large crowds through his ranged options, making it well within his means to camp out what advantages Zoda may have with the Death Anchor and Reactor Mights. This poison affliction is something that Zoda has basically no answer for, meaning that he'd get worn down in an attempt to swat his opponent out of the sky. By comparison, the only notable thing that Zoda has outside of the Death Anchor is brute force, and an ability to manipulate memories... hardly a factor for Mumkhar in a fight like this, when spiting Dunban seems to be his one drive in life. Hell, Zoda's misuse of his power to implant or revise memories is what got Ryu Suzaku reunited with Haruka in the first place."
Boomstick: "You'd expect the Reactor Mights to do a lot of good here! But unfortunately for Zoda specifically, it's not the first time even one of those snitches has attempted to take him over*. I mean, sure, face units have experienced fatigue before (just look at Fiora), this doesn't apply to Mumkhar by any stretch of the imagination. Hell, MK Ultra over here has had to deal with the defences of Prison Island bypassing what defences he thought he had - and it's only led to him getting back up more pissed off than hurt."
*CORNER BOX: "Keep in mind, this is just one singular Reactor Might, meanwhile the blast from the Dark Matter Reactor is better substantiated by all six of the Reactor Mights being in close proximity."
*CORNER BOX (2): "It's tempting to call a higher-tiered Zoda driven by a Reactor Might an outlier, but in actuality, it's more accurate to just mention that Ryu Suzaku and Falcon have better control over the Reactor Mights than Zoda does, with better training."
Wiz: "All of this means that Zoda does not have consistent access to the closest thing we could call a win condition for him in this fight, at the risk of same dragging on long enough for the power of the Reactor Might recoiling on him. And while it's apt to point out scenarios where Mumkhar has to win that proverbial neutral several times, given the tools at his disposal, it's not unreasonable to imagine him doing so in half of these cases. At Zoda's best, he was certainly a high hurdle for Mumkhar to overcome, but the first Face Mechon's blazing speed, poison inducement and greater tactical acumen led to one race Zoda couldn't bring himself to finish."
Boomstick: "Wipe that scar off your face, Zoda! The podium isn't the claw of the issue!"
Wiz: "The winner is Metal Face."
Last edited:
