An angry 90 year old man punches a 16 year old Waifu in the face for being too pure

[DMUA]

Eh, this'll probably be way out of wack but who cares it's better then Gergy with a 25% chance to OHK vs Kirito

Speed Equalized

High 7-C vs Low 7-B (Far above 392.5 Kilotons vs Far above 903 Kilotons. IE not even 3x in a world where it's 7.5 to oneshot

Otherwise Standard Battle Assumptions

Kai (SAO:TTRPG):

Dexion Starr:

Inconclusive:

 

[Smashtwig]

Kai wins easily.

Dex's morality is too terrible and should be immediately smited for punching a waifu, how dare he

 

[Mr. Bambu]

...

yeah Mogar should rematch Kirito, I'll get on that later

How does Kai win easy? Portal spam sorta deals with that and the nature of magic items in D&D deals with intangibility.

 

[Mr. Bambu]

Just for Dexion's points.

He literally dominates mobility through blinking and dimension door.

He literally dominates in senses via ever smoking pipe obscuring all vision (he fights in this fine).

He heals with every swing and has similar passive fearhax bullshittery as Mogar when using the Rod of Lordly Might.

Physical damage gets absorbed by his armor, partially.

 

[Smashtwig]

She wins via DQ. Dex is bully in this situation. Stahp Bullying

 

[Mr. Bambu]

kek

if we move this to fun and games then yeah

 

[Mr. Bambu]

Also recently figured out the characters are actually older than I knew, so people like Ryan St. Germaine are nearly 200 (189).

 

[DMUA]

Kai is also capable of teleporting up to a turn range (which can mean up to Kilometers considering Sonic Leap)

Perception manipulation is resisted but I'm not sure that's that, if it's all senses Kai has literally 0 reason to not bail from it

He'd have to hit with said swing and Kai has extreme speed amping and countering ability, and fearhax is resisted

She has a bit more AP and can hit up to 5x more then a person normally can in a turn.

 

[Mr. Bambu]

...perception manipulation in this case is a lot of smoke blocking vision.

D&D is used to hitting speed amping, that's not a counter. Also... how high fearhax? Again, scales to kingdoms of goblins.

That's just peachy.

 

[Mr. Bambu]

If it wasn't obvious so far I'm voting Dexion. Experienced in countering exactly what Kai has to offer (teleporting/speed amping/stronger opponent), more experienced fighter, and has his own abilities to add.

 

[DMUA]

It is when you're being nearly blitzed (or outright blitzed in the case of sword skills) and amps you are used to usually cap at 2x

Since when did intimidation work on that high of a group? Mindhax does, but mind control and intimidation are two very different things in D&D.

 

[Mr. Bambu]

Cap at stacked 2x.

Since it scales to the mindhax. Rod of Lordly Might works differently than normal Intimidation. It just shares the effects.

 

[Mr. Bambu]

also can we just address the 16 year old waifu comment in the OP

 

[DMUA]

... so she just gets stunlocked ad infinitum because she only resists normal spookhax

.... Just when I thought D&D had something fair

It's a trick she's actually 17

Also it's not pedophilia if you're also underaged

 

[Mr. Bambu]

It's fair in game kek.

But yeah out of context Dexion's fear is > Mogar's even though in-verse they're exactly similar.

 

[DMUA]

Not everyone resists 2-A mindhax meany

 

[Mr. Bambu]

Nah Homebrew doesn't scale to 2-A.

We don't accept shitty 4e round these parts.

Just kingdoms of mindhax will do since Nilbogs are very much a thing.

 

[DMUA]

4e still did nothing wrong

 

[Mr. Bambu]

> denial

 

[DMUA]

You can't deny something that doesn't exist