Ruphas Mafahl Profile and Its Grammatical Issues.

[Jvando]

I was going through Ruphas Mafahl's profile and noticed that there was a good deal of awkward sentence structure in the descriptions of techniques and skills under Notable Attacks/Techniques. It made the profile a bit difficult to read so I went ahead and tried to edit it a bit, but I didn't post them because I felt like such large scale sentence restructuring might lose some context that I missed. I was wondering if anyone familiar with the character and series would check the edits I made here and help me with the parts I had questions on? If you check the history of my sandbox, I made sure to submit the current draft on the profile first so that you could check to see what edits I made.

For those who don't know how to do that, you can click the down arrow to the right of the "edit" button and click "history". then click "prev" on the topmost highlighted section. I will be at work for a bit so I won't be able to reply but feel free to make edits if you think they are needed.

 

[Celestial_Pegasus]

I was planning on cleaning it up, adding scans and what not.

Just going to finish adding abilities and changing her tier first.