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The McChad Quest of Buffslava: The game

DMUA

He/Him
VS Battles
Calculation Group
24,802
6,054
Buffslava. The homeland of many clans... McChad, McFucker, and many others quite numerous. Some villainous, some friendly, it's as variable as the people of the world we know today. You have been born into that first one, the McChads, a clan of proud lifters and metal enthusiasts, who have gladly raised you since birth.

... Gladly raised, but, it seems you've been hit rather hard in the head by a Medicine ball, and you need to remind yourself of your name while your buddy tries to shake you back into consciousness.

"Hey, flexing, get up!"

Flexing, get up... What kind of statement is... oh, yeah. Now you remember. Your parents were pretty simple folk, so your name is Flexing.

After a bit, you manage to get your eyes open, and stand on your feet, a little bit wobbly. Your friend was the one to help you up, and around you, you can see the architecture... a gym of cobblestone, like a castle mixed with the modern art of creating swole... Then again, this is what you've always known, why is that usual to you?


"... I guess I threw that way too hard, didn't I?"

"... Pretty sure I have a concussion now."

You remember this guy too. Strongarm McChad. You've been friends since childhood, due to your simple names that most other kids would mock. He's a bit aloof. You said one line about how one of his throws was way off, and once he got the ball back, this is how he responded.

As you get an understanding of your situation better, some of the older guys in the area come over to figure out what happened.


"You know it's against the rules to break the sound barrier in this area, Strongarm!"

"Yeah, yeah...."

"Are you okay, Flexing?"

"... Maybe? I dunno."

"... Go to the Sportsman."

Well, with that in mind, you go to get checked up. The doctor is a pretty laid back guy, who speaks quietly about whatever he's discussing. It makes for a hilarious image, when his massive frame simply sits in a chair, both hands near his lap, and considering the damage to your head, you can't help but laugh a bit at that.

"... Laughing with minimal provocation is quite serious. Stand still."

The sportsman stands up from his chair, and starts moving his arms in an almost hypnotizing fashion... focusing, channeling mystic energy... Before he suddenly shoves, removing the injuries from your brain.

"Alright, I'll see you later, Flexing. You won't be able to do much in The McChad-****** Grand Brawl like that."

Even if your head was still messed up, there was no way you'd forget what he was talking about. The McChad-****** Grand Brawl... a yearly event, where the fists powered by cardio and martial arts clash against the fists of swole and the hands of grappling. It's always an amazing sight... And this is the first year you'll be able to get in. It's divided into age groups, you've just hit the age of 15, so you'll be fighting everyone up to 18 year olds. You did always wish it started earlier, but, nothing can be done, can it?

Either way, you need to get back to training. As does Strongarm... he's probably facing the same punishment he always does for stuff like this.

Cleaning every dirty weight in the storage.

Luckily, he's gotten it so many times, he's become an utter speed demon at doing it, and he's done by the time you get there.


"Hey! So, ugh... what were we going to do next again?"

"... I was the one hit in the head, not you."

"Come on man, you know I don't memorize this stuff. I just go along with what you do, bro."

Sigh.

That said, what was the next routine?


  • Benchpress. Got to crank up that tricep and pectoral power.
  • Squats. You need good legpower if you want to be able to stay in the ring.
  • Deadlift. Works the lower body as well, but, a different area. Just as important.
  • Write in...
 
Is this entire RP just going to be people picking their own options and not agreeing with anyone else
 
I'm not sure how often I want to make updates

Maybe I'll make another one later today, since there isn't anything particularly crazy happening here
 
Well I've been gone for a minute but I'm back now



"Deadlift."

"Alright, let's do this!"

You spend plenty of time deadlifting, thoroughly making your legs, glutes and some of your back sore. You're sure you'll feel much stronger... later. For now you definitely do not.

Your now weakened legs still manage to carry you home, where you receive a great deal of sustenance from your family. They asked if your head was okay, and how you've definitely been growing well. That's a nice sign.

... Then again, you can't really remember their names, so, maybe there is a little bit of lasting damage to your head. Oh well, sleep it off.


  • Write in your parent's name. Don't make me regret doing this like old school JRPGs, before the curse of voice acting came



Eventually, it's a brand new day. You ended up waking up early, so, you look outside your window, and take in the sight of the place you've lived in for so long.

Buildings and trees line your vision. Homes of stone and wood, carved by bare, swole hands. It's not too ambitious, architecture wise, but, if hasn't broken, it should be good enough. That's how tradition is, you guess.

Either way, that's enough expositing to yourself about this place. Let's get out there.



Now, I'm not entirely sure how to proceed honestly. I did make this on a whim, so I don't entirely have that much of a plan. That said, how do you want the story to go?

  • Continue taking it slowly, training up and bonding with Strongarm, while I sneak in some exposition about the overall environment
  • Quickly do a montage and get straight into the explanation of and performance of the McChad-****** Grand Brawl
 
Grand old pops is Andrew McChad and the beautiful woman who gave birth to us Alsie McChad.
Take it slowly
 
Oh yeah, your parents were Andrew McChad and Alsie McChad. Let's hope that doesn't become important.

Anyways, you go to intake several strength enhancing powders boasting the magical property of "Protein" along with your breakfast, then meet up with Strongarm McChad. Working out is always better with a partner.


"Let's do this!"

"... You say that like, every mornin'."

"It's a ritual for gains, man."

Ever the goof.

Anyways, you head up to the gym. Walking up to it now, it reveals itself as a castle of gains. It's not really that fortified, all it has is a wooden sign to announce it's stays and large, unnecessary doors that serve as their own test of strength. For, whoever was old enough to move them, could partake in the gains within.

Both you and Strongarm could move them when you turned 6. You've heard of some who were able to move it immediately when they were able to walk.

Anyways, enough reminiscing. Once you're inside, it's time to do triceps and pecs, starting with Bench press. You need overall body balance. Don't want to be a chicken or a T-Rex, legwise.



Oh lord your chest and arms this hurts so much but it's also the right kind so you can't complain

Both you and Strongarm manage to get out of the gym, at least.


"Huff... Puff... Okay, so, we're already done, and the sun's still up."

Just as you get to thinking about what to do with your spare time, you feel a presence of something wrong near the edge of town.

Go look?
 
[Y'all better be ready for what you're about to invoke]
 
"... Do you feel that?"

"Definitely. We should probably go take a look."

You can't help but agree, but, you still feel like this is a mistake.


Once you arrive...

Oh lord this was a mistake.


"I, HECKER MCFRICKER, DEMAND A SPOT IN THE TOURNAMENT!"

The McFricker clan. Everything that you were told to absolutely not be when you were a kid, embodied in the form of someone who appears to be around 14 years old.

"Do you really expect us to just give it up to the likes of you!?"

One of the elders... You think his name is Gavin, stands up to the McFricker, a foot over his height and about as displeased as he should be.

"I mean, you don't have to give it up..."

Hecker roundhouse kicks them, going for the side of their head, but Gavin manages to raise his arm to block the attack, though he's still knocked back.

"I can just take it from you!"

The McFricker engages in combat, launching plenty of kicks and blows with a great deal of brute force against Gavin.

It's definitely a dire situation, but he is a veteran... Maybe he'll manage something?


  • Stay back. You aren't prepared for something wild and strong like a McFricker.
  • No way. You've got Strongarm on your back, there's no excuse to not deal with this attack on your family!
  • Plan of engagement, if you wish to proceed with that? Be specific, your arms are already weakened from working out today, if you get hit too much you'll be the one in need of a rescue.
 
**** it, charge in blindly! No mercy fellas! They dare to step on our territory?! They get the beat down!
 
Plan of Engagement: Our arms aren’t in good enough condition to fight directly, the best move is to distract the McFricker so Gavin can bring him down. There’s probably something in the area we could punt, both Strongarm and I should take some distance and start kicking stuff at the enemy.
 
There’s probably something in the area we could punt, both Strongarm and I should take some distance and start kicking stuff at the enemy.
For your good thinking, I will give you some extra environmental information.

You're on the outskirts of town, and you're on an open field. There is a little bit of elevation, the further you depart from town, but it's mostly minor and won't stop you from moving up.

About 10 meters past Gavin and Hecker, there is a pretty good sized rock. Get a good kick on it, and it might just work for an initial hit. There are other rocks scattered across the field of various size, as well.

Extra lore: Those rocks are placed there for the express purpose of tossing. They're usually used and shattered upon oncoming threats, which is why one of the Elder's duty is to punch a bit of extra rock off of a nearby mountain and move those over to town. Over the centuries, many have been whittled down by these means, but nothing culturally significant.
 
Hmmm, get Strongarm to follow us to toss the rocks at the McFricker, while we are at it, we should try to call for help from other people.
 
Keep in mind that our arms are still exhausted, to the point that we almost struggled with the gym’s weighted doors. The rocks may be there for tossing originally, but kicking them will probably be easier right now.

Anyway, since Gavin and Hecker are between us and the best rocks, we should wait a moment before moving. Large movements like kicks, especially roundhouses, involve turning the body and creating large blind spots, so the next time Hecker kicks we should move around him on the side of the kicker leg to the rock, while directing Strongarm to a different rock nearby. Then we kick the rocks at Hecker to give Gavin more chances to attack.
 
Good idea, I still think we should yell for help, that way it might be able to inspire fear in the McFricker since now the whole town would know of his presence.
 
The plan is to run around him, just when he’s looking in a different direction, so he doesn’t see us. If possible we should try to catch him off guard with the rock for maximum damage and confusion.
Calling for help also seems like a good idea, I’d say we should either do that after the first kick, or have Strongarm do it while we move to the rock behind Hecker (so it can act as a distraction from our movement).
 
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